By Vanessa, Myanmar

Since I was little, my parents taught me to be reasonable, kind to others, understanding of others’ difficulties, and not to split hairs over every little thing. They said that this was what made someone a good person, and that it would earn others’ respect and esteem. I also thought that was a good way to be, and I often reminded myself to be considerate and kind. I never got into conflict with my family or the other villagers, and I was very concerned with making a favorable impression. My fellow villagers often praised me, saying I had good humanity and was considerate, and I didn’t bicker with anyone when they offended me. This kind of praise made me really happy. I thought that as a person, I should be amicable in this way, and I should be understanding even when someone was in the wrong. I felt certain that this was the standard for being a good person. I kept doing things that way after becoming a believer, too.

Then in November 2021, I was elected as a church deacon and started spreading the gospel with a few other brothers and sisters. One of them, Kevin, was from the same village as me. He had some caliber—his fellowship was relatively clear when he shared the gospel, and he was able to use examples to explain things, to help those investigating the true way understand. But I discovered that he was quite arrogant, and didn’t like accepting others’ suggestions. Also, a lot of the time he didn’t follow the principles in his duty. Rather than exalting and bearing witness to God in his gospel work, he talked a lot about how many people he’d converted. He’d also say that the brothers and sisters all liked listening to him preach and really adulated him. Once, someone who was looking into the true way praised him for having good caliber and preaching well. I’d noticed that Kevin exalted himself and showed off quite a bit, and when sharing the gospel, he didn’t focus on bearing witness to God’s work of the last days or on resolving people’s religious notions. I wanted to mention this to Kevin, but after a bit of thought I decided to wait a little longer. I wanted him to know that I was a kind, reasonable person who didn’t call attention to every little problem I saw. I thought I should encourage and help him more. Later, the leader would often send out relevant principles for sharing the gospel to our group and I indirectly fellowshiped a little on things relating to Kevin’s behavior. I was hoping that he would come to see his issues through that fellowship. But time passed, and still he didn’t turn himself around. I wanted to bring up his problems again, but then I thought that since he was a fairly arrogant person, he might not accept my advice. I was afraid he’d think I was unreasonable and unkind, and would develop a bad impression of me. If we came to an impasse in our relationship and couldn’t work well together, my image as a good person would be ruined. At this thought, I just swallowed my words. I felt kind of bad at the time, so I came before God in prayer, asking Him for the strength to practice the truth. After that, Kevin, a few other brothers and sisters and I all went to a village to share the gospel. I noticed that Kevin was still showing off in his fellowship—talking about how he didn’t care about money, and how he paid a price for God. He wasn’t focused on fellowshiping the truth. On the way home, I mustered up my courage and said to him, “You didn’t enter into the principles in your preaching and testifying to God. You need to focus on fellowshiping the truth with potential gospel recipients, on bringing them before God….” Before I could finish, he responded with, “There’s nothing wrong with my fellowship. You’re overthinking things.” I was afraid of wounding his pride if I said anything more, and of damaging our rapport. I was also worried that he’d think ill of me, so I didn’t say anything else. I felt like that was good enough—let him gradually come to see it himself. I found out later that even though we were busy all the time, we weren’t getting good results in our gospel work. Some of those in the village who had been investigating had heard Kevin fellowship several times yet still didn’t understand. On top of that, they were impacted by rumors, had notions, and didn’t want to look into God’s work anymore. Then there were others who really looked up to Kevin and only wanted to listen to his fellowship, rather than anyone else’s. Seeing this made me really uncomfortable, and I felt quite guilty. These issues had a lot to do with Kevin himself. If I’d brought up his problems earlier, he could have seen them and changed, and our gospel work wouldn’t have been set back. But after that, when I really wanted to bring it up, I got worried again that it would damage our rapport, and I felt really conflicted. I figured I could talk to the leader and have her fellowship with him, then our cooperation in our duty wouldn’t be impacted, and we could still get along. So, I talked to the leader about what was going on with Kevin. She found some relevant words of God and had us enter into them together, and it seemed Kevin made a bit of a change. So, I just let it go.

Once, I mentioned the matter to another sister who pointed out that I was always protective of my relationships with others, and that was a sign of being a people-pleaser. I thought there was no way I was a people-pleaser—people-pleasers are deceitful. I’d never done anything deceitful, so how could I be one of them? At the time I didn’t want to accept her feedback, but I also knew that there was a lesson for me to learn from what she’d said. I prayed to God, asking Him to guide me to know myself. Later, I read God’s words: “People’s conduct and ways of dealing with the world must be based on the words of God; this is the most basic principle for human conduct. How can people practice the truth if they do not understand the principles of human conduct? Practicing the truth is not about saying empty words or shouting slogans. Rather it is about how, no matter what people encounter in life, as long as it involves the principles of human conduct, their perspectives on things, or the matter of performing their duties, they are faced with making a choice, and they should seek the truth, search for a basis and principles in God’s words, and then find a path of practice. Those who can practice in this way are people who pursue the truth. To be able to pursue the truth in this way no matter how great the difficulties one encounters is to walk the path of Peter, the path of pursuing the truth. For example: What principle should be followed when it comes to interacting with others? Perhaps your original viewpoint is that ‘Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance,’ and that you should keep on everyone’s good side, avoid causing others to lose face, and offend no one, thereby achieving good relations with others. Constricted by this viewpoint, you keep silent when you witness others doing bad things or violating the principles. You would rather that the work of the church suffers losses than offend anyone. You seek to stay on everyone’s good side, no matter who they are. You think only about human sentiments and saving face when you speak, and you always speak nice-sounding words to please others. Even if you discover that someone has problems, you choose to tolerate them, and just talk about them behind their back, but to their face you keep the peace and maintain your relationship. What do you think of such conduct? Is it not that of a people pleaser? Is it not pretty slippery? It violates the principles of human conduct. Is it not lowly to conduct yourself in such a manner? Those who act like this are not good people, this is not a noble way to conduct oneself. No matter how much you have suffered, and no matter how many prices you have paid, if you conduct yourself without principles, then you have failed in this respect, and your conduct will not be recognized, remembered, or accepted before God” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. To Perform One’s Duty Well, One Must at Least Be Possessed of a Conscience and Reason). I reflected on myself in light of God’s words. I’d felt like I wasn’t a people-pleaser, but how did I really act? During that time, I’d seen that Kevin was showing off a lot in his gospel work. I should have pointed that issue out to help him know himself and do his duty in line with the principles, but I was worried being direct would hurt our relationship. I was always considerate of his feelings and didn’t dare say anything too direct. I even wanted to give him more encouragement, to give him the impression I was a good person and get him to think highly of me. But in fact, I knew that when cooperating with brothers and sisters on a duty, if we notice problems, we need to point them out to one another, make up for each other’s weaknesses, and uphold the church’s work together. I was knowingly doing the wrong thing and not practicing the truth. As a result, Kevin didn’t recognize his own issues. He kept showing off while sharing the gospel, and paid no attention to fellowshiping on the truth. That meant the religious notions of those investigating weren’t resolved and some people, when they were disturbed, stopped attending gatherings. I saw the impact on our work and felt quite guilty, but I was afraid Kevin would become biased against me if I was direct, and that it would damage our relationship. So I deceitfully got a church leader to fellowship with him so that I wouldn’t have to offend him. I saw that I tried to protect relationships with others and ingratiate myself with them in my duty, that I wasn’t upholding the church’s interests at all and didn’t have a sense of justice, and that I wasn’t remotely principled. I wasn’t someone who practiced the truth at all. Isn’t that exactly how a people-pleaser acts? After that, I read a passage of God’s words exposing antichrists: “To all appearances, the antichrists’ words seem especially kind, cultured, and distinguished. No matter who violates principle or disrupts and disturbs church work, the antichrist does not expose or criticize these people; they turn a blind eye, letting people think they are magnanimous in all matters. Regardless of what corruptions people reveal and what evil deeds they do, the antichrist is understanding and tolerant. They do not grow angry, or fly into a rage, they will not get cross and blame people when they do something wrong and harm the interests of God’s house. No matter who commits evil and disturbs the work of the church, they pay no heed, as if this has nothing to do with them, and they will never offend people because of it. What are the antichrists most concerned with? With how many people think highly of them, and with how many people see them when they suffer, and praise them for it. The antichrists believe that suffering must never be for nothing; no matter what hardship they endure, what price they pay, what good deeds they do, how caring, considerate, and loving they are toward others, this must all be carried out in front of others so that more people can see it. And what is their aim in acting thus? To buy people’s favor, to make more people approve of their actions, their conduct, and their character in their hearts, giving a thumbs up. There are even antichrists that try to establish an image of themselves as ‘a good person’ through this outwardly good behavior, so that more people come to them looking for help” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Ten)). I felt so guilty after reading God’s words, as if God were right in front of me, exposing my satanic disposition. I reflected that I was always trying to be an understanding, kind person because I felt that doing so would gain me respect and praise from others—I would be liked by the people around me. I was like that when doing a duty with other brothers and sisters, too. On the surface, I hadn’t exposed Kevin’s issues for fear of harming his pride and our ongoing partnership. But in fact, everything I did had been to protect my own name and status. I’d been using surface-level kindness to disguise myself and make myself look good, to curry favor so people would think I was loving, patient, and tolerant—that I was a good, kind person. But I hadn’t taken to heart whether the church’s work or brothers’ and sisters’ lives were harmed. Only then did I see how slippery and deceitful I was. It looked like I never offended anyone, like I was a good person, but in fact, my own vile motives were behind all of my actions. I saw that I had the same disposition as an antichrist, that I was sacrificing the church’s interests to uphold my own image and status. I would be in great danger if I remained on this path—I would become more and more distant from God and end up spurned by Him! I really despised myself when I realized this, and also felt quite upset. I said a prayer: “God, I’m always disguising myself and making myself look good, focusing on creating a positive image. I don’t want to stay on this path. I wish to repent, and rebel against my corrupt disposition.”

I read more of God’s words after that: “The standard by which humans judge other humans is based on their behavior; those whose conduct is good are righteous, while those whose conduct is abominable are evil. The standard by which God judges humans is based on whether their essence submits to Him or not; one who submits to God is a righteous person, while one who does not is an enemy and an evil person, regardless of whether this person’s behavior is good or bad and regardless of whether their speech is correct or incorrect” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. God and Man Will Enter Into Rest Together). “It may be that in all your years of faith in God, you have never cursed anyone or committed a bad deed, yet in your association with Christ, you cannot speak the truth, act honestly, or submit to the word of Christ; in that case, I say that you are the most sinister and malicious person in the world. You may be exceptionally amiable and devoted toward your relatives, friends, wife (or husband), sons and daughters, and parents, and never take advantage of others, but if you are incapable of compatibility with Christ, if you are unable to interact in harmony with Him, then even if you expend your all in relief to your neighbors or take meticulous care of your father, mother, and members of your household, I would say that you are still an evil person, and moreover one full of cunning tricks” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Those Who Are Incompatible With Christ Are Surely Opponents of God). I could see from God’s words that people’s standard for measuring others is based on how well they behave. Those who behave well are good people, while those who behave badly are bad people. But God’s standard is based on whether they follow His way, and on their essence and their attitude toward submitting to God. It isn’t based on how nice their outward behavior is. I had always considered myself a good person, because I’d never argued or started conflict with anyone, family or otherwise, since I was a child. Even if someone started arguing with me, I’d resolve it by placating them. My fellow villagers always praised me for being a good person; I also thought being this way meant I’d reached the standard of a good person. Now it had become apparent to me that although I wasn’t appearing to do evil, I wasn’t being honest in word or deed. I’d seen that Kevin doing his duty without principle, and showing off constantly, had impacted the effectiveness of our work. Yet to protect my image as a good person, I hadn’t exposed or helped him, and I hadn’t upheld the church’s interests. So even though others thought I was a good person, before God I was still counter to Him and the truth, and I was, in essence, doing evil. I saw that judging whether someone was good or evil based on external behaviors wasn’t the right standard. Some people seem to do a lot of nice things, but they strongly resist and condemn God’s work and words. They are evildoers. I thought of a sister I worked with. As far as I could tell, she didn’t care about being warm or kind in her words, but she had a relatively strong sense of justice. She said what needed to be said when she saw others not acting according to the truth. She helped her brothers and sisters seek the truth and do their duty according to principle, providing them with real benefits. Thinking about this gave me some resolve to stop following my mistaken perspectives on trying to seem like a nice person. I had to act according to the truth of God’s words, and pursue being a truly good person.

I read a passage of God’s words that gave me a path of practice. Almighty God says: “What people should strive to achieve most is to make the words of God their basis, and the truth their criterion; only then can they live in the light and live out the likeness of a normal person. If you wish to live in the light, you should act according to the truth; you should be an honest person who says honest words and does honest things. What is fundamental is to have the truth principles in one’s comportment; once people lose the truth principles, and focus only on good behavior, this inevitably gives rise to fakery and pretense. If there is no principle to people’s comportment, then no matter how good their behavior is, they are hypocrites; they may be able to mislead others for a time, but they will never be trustworthy. Only when people act and comport themselves according to God’s words do they have a true foundation. If they do not comport themselves according to God’s words, and only focus on pretending to behave well, can they become good people as a result? Absolutely not. Good doctrines and behavior cannot change man’s corrupt dispositions, and they cannot change his essence. Only the truth and the words of God can change people’s corrupt dispositions, thoughts, and opinions, and become their life. … God demands that people tell the truth, say what they think, and not trick, mislead, make fun of, satirize, deride, mock, or constrict others, or expose their weaknesses, or hurt them. Are these not the principles of speech? What does it mean to say one should not expose people’s weaknesses? It means not to get dirt on other people. Do not hold on to their past mistakes or shortcomings in order to judge or condemn them. This is the least you should do. On the proactive side, how is constructive speech expressed? It is mainly encouraging, orienting, guiding, exhorting, understanding, and comforting. Also, in some special instances, it becomes necessary to directly expose other people’s errors and prune them, so that they gain knowledge of the truth and desire to repent. Only then is the due effect achieved. This way of practicing is of great benefit to people. It is a real help to them, and it is constructive for them, is it not?” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (3)). In God’s words, I found the principle for conducting myself. We need to be honest people according to His words. When we see others’ problems we should point them out and help them—this is of benefit to them. We should protect the church’s work and be edifying for others. I wanted to put the truth into practice immediately once I understood this path, to have a heart-to-heart with Kevin and bring up his issues. This would be in order to rectify his attitude toward his duty and allow him to understand his corrupt disposition and the deviations in his duty—it would be to help him. So I sought him out, ready to point out his problems. Just then, I again felt some concern, worried about what he would think of me. I quickly prayed to God, rebelling against these incorrect motives that I harbored. I thought about how recently I hadn’t been practicing the truth, which was hurting our work, and I felt really guilty. I knew that God examines my every thought and deed, and that I had to be an honest person. I couldn’t protect my image and violate the truth anymore. This thought gave me the courage to rebel against my corrupt disposition and talk to Kevin truthfully about his issues. To my surprise, he heard me out and was able to accept it. He said, “I haven’t fully understood some principles. In the future please tell me about any issues you see. We can help each other and do our duty well together.” I was thrilled to hear him say this, and so grateful to God. I also felt ashamed and regretful for not having already put the truth into practice. If I’d brought this up with him before, we could have improved our work results sooner, and he would have learned about his corrupt disposition earlier. I saw that practicing the truth is of benefit to others, to one’s self, and to one’s duty.

Now, when I see brothers’ and sisters’ issues I actively point them out, because I know this is practicing the truth and is helping them. I’ve also seen that living according to God’s requirements and doing things by the truth principles is the only way to practice the truth and be a good person.