By Ye Ping, China

In October 2021, I began doing my duty as a leader in the Daybreak Church. On the night of December 10, I received a letter saying that gospel deacon Yang Hui and his family had been arrested by the police on the afternoon of the 8th. I suddenly realized that the next morning, Brother Li Zhi, one of my partners, was scheduled to meet with Yang Hui and others. I discussed this with my other partner Sister Zhang Xin, and we decided to quickly inform Li Zhi about Yang Hui’s arrest the following morning. Zhang Xin went the next day, but by noon on the 12th, she still hadn’t returned. I became anxious and fearful, worrying that Zhang Xin might also have been arrested. If they were all caught, many brothers and sisters would be implicated, and the church’s books of God’s words would be in danger. If we didn’t hurry to transfer the books before the police conducted a search, the loss would be significant, and my transgression would be severe. Thinking about these things made me even more afraid. I kept praying to God in my heart, “Oh God! My stature is too small, and I don’t know how to get through this situation. Please enlighten and guide me, and give me the faith and courage to deal with this aftermath properly.” After praying, I immediately wrote a letter to arrange a meeting with two sisters to discuss transferring the books of God’s words. As I was about to leave, the sister who was hosting me anxiously said, “You can’t leave! If you go out and don’t come back, what will happen to the church’s work?” Seeing her fearful expression made me even more worried: “They still haven’t returned yet, so they must have been arrested. If I go out, will someone follow me? What if I really don’t come back?” In my heart, I kept praying to God and I thought of God’s words: “Faith is like a single log bridge: Those who cling abjectly to life will have difficulty in crossing it, but those who are ready to sacrifice themselves can pass over, sure of foot and worry-free. If man harbors timid and fearful thoughts, it is because Satan has fooled them, afraid that we will cross the bridge of faith to enter into God. Satan is trying in every way possible to send us its thoughts. We should at every moment pray for God to illuminate and enlighten us, at every moment rely on God to purge Satan’s poison from within us, practice within our spirit at every moment how to come close to God, and let God have dominion over our whole being” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Utterances of Christ in the Beginning, Chapter 6). Now that the church was facing arrests, it was my responsibility and urgent duty to protect the brothers and sisters and the books of God’s words. My fear of being arrested was a thought sent by Satan. I had to avoid falling into Satan’s trap. If I hid out of fear of being arrested and didn’t transfer the books of God’s words in time, and the books were seized by the police, I would have transgressed. Failing to protect the church’s interests at this critical moment would be a disgrace. Although the transfer process was risky, I believed that God is almighty, and that everything was under God’s control. Whether I was to be arrested was determined by God; if God did not permit it, the police would not even touch a single hair on my head. Reflecting on God’s words, I became less fearful. After discussing with the two sisters, we quickly split up to take action separately. One went to inform the brothers and sisters, and I, along with another sister, took charge of transferring the books of God’s words. Only when all the books of God’s words had been safely transferred did I finally feel relieved.

Later, due to the betrayal of a Judas, more and more people in the church were arrested, and the books of God’s words kept getting seized by the police. On January 14, 2022, Yang Hong, who was hosting me, was also arrested by the police. Without a suitable place to stay, I considered rushing off to escape, thinking, “If caught by the police, I will endure severe torture. If I can’t bear it and betray God like Judas, the consequences will be unimaginable.” I finally found a relatively safe place, but before long, this place was also sold out by a Judas, so I had to move again. Without a suitable place to stay, I felt that nowhere was safe for us. I felt so helpless and distressed, and couldn’t help but complain, “When will these days spent living in constant fear and anxiety, come to an end? It would be better if the police just arrested and beat me to death.” In my abject pain, I thought of God’s words: “You must endure all; for Me, you must be ready to relinquish everything you possess and do everything you can to follow Me, and be ready to expend your all. Now is the time that I shall test you: Will you offer your loyalty to Me? Can you loyally follow Me to the end of the road? Be not afraid; with My support, who could ever block this road? Remember this! Do not forget! All that occurs is by My goodwill, and everything is under My observation. Can you follow My word in all that you say and do? When the trials of fire come upon you, will you kneel down and call out? Or will you cower, incapable of moving forward?” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Utterances of Christ in the Beginning, Chapter 10). God’s words helped me understand that though this wave of persecution and arrests the church was facing, with some Judases being revealed and the lack of safe places to do duties, presented us with many difficulties, these difficulties were able to perfect my faith and reveal my corruption. God’s work in the last days is meant to test people’s faith through various forms of persecution, tribulation, trials, and refinements, revealing who truly believes and who does not. Those who continue to read God’s words and remain loyal in their duties in danger and adversity, standing firm in testimony in the face of the great red dragon even when arrested, are the true believers and followers of God. On the other hand, those who cower, abandon their duties, and betray God to protect themselves during persecution and tribulation are the tares and disbelievers revealed through God’s work and they will ultimately be eliminated. This is the wisdom of God’s work. In the past, I thought I had strong faith and trusted God, but the facts showed that I lacked true loyalty and submission. In such a situation, I kept hiding and moving around, complaining and refusing to submit when I faced physical suffering, and even considering letting the police catch and beat me to death to avoid living in constant fear. I saw just how rebellious I had been! I was failing to bear witness for God at crucial moments, and was instead, compromising with Satan. I truly disappointed God! I also realized that, in the face of persecution and adversity, I should maintain loyalty to God, and endure any hardship to the end, which is what true believers should do. With this understanding, I felt strengthened.

In March 2022, a sister who had been released informed me that the police knew I was a church leader and were using the Skynet surveillance system to track me, bragging that they would catch me as soon as I left the house. This information made me extremely anxious and fearful, and I felt like I was in constant danger of being caught. I thought, “If the police catch me, they won’t let me go easily. Since they are specifically targeting leaders, they will definitely force me to betray the brothers and sisters. If I don’t betray them, they will surely use severe torture on me, possibly even beating me to death or maiming me. If I’m beaten to death, won’t my journey of believing in God come to an end? Won’t I lose my chance to be saved?” I couldn’t bear to think on this any further. A few days later, I received a letter from an upper leader instructing me and Sister Chen Li to transfer to the Morning Star Church. I was secretly pleased, thinking, “I can finally leave this place. The situation here is too scary; the police have already arrested over ninety people. Staying here is too risky!” While waiting to transfer, I received another letter from the Morning Star Church. They said that two church leaders and dozens of brothers and sisters had been arrested, and that some of the books of God’s words had been confiscated by the police. Chen Li, being familiar with the situation there, had to head over that very night to handle the aftermath, delaying my transfer. Chen Li said, “The environment is so bad, and we have to go to the Morning Star Church to handle the aftermath. If you leave now, what will happen to the work of this church of ours?” Her words made me feel very guilty. The sisters were risking their lives to handle the aftermath while I was thinking of leaving early. As a church leader, I wasn’t protecting the church’s work or considering the sisters’ difficulties at this critical time, and just wanted to leave. How could I be so selfish? Realizing this, I explained the situation to the upper leader and expressed my willingness to stay and handle the church’s work. At this moment, I came before God to pray and seek, “What is God’s intention in allowing such an environment? How should I reflect on and know myself?” At that time, I read a passage of God’s words: “When those who are loyal to God know clearly that an environment is dangerous, they still brave the risk of doing the work of handling the aftermath, and they keep the losses to God’s house to a minimum before they themselves withdraw. They do not give priority to their own safety. Tell Me, in this wicked country of the great red dragon, who could ensure that there is no danger at all in believing in God and doing a duty? Whatever duty one takes on, it entails some risk—yet the performance of duty is commissioned by God, and while following God, one must take on the risk of doing their duty. One should exercise wisdom, and one has need of taking measures to ensure their safety, but one should not put their personal safety first. They should consider God’s intentions, putting the work of His house first and putting the spread of the gospel first. Completing God’s commission of them is what matters most, and it comes first” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Two)). Reading God’s words, I understood that those who truly believe in God and are loyal to Him, when seeing the great red dragon madly arresting God’s chosen people, can rebel against the flesh, disregard their own safety, and uphold the interests of God’s house. This is someone who considers God’s intention, someone with humanity and conscience. But when I saw that the church work needed cooperation, I only thought about my own safety and how to leave this place quickly, so I wouldn’t have to spend my days living in constant fear and anxiety anymore. I didn’t consider the church’s work or sympathize with the sisters’ difficulties, and just wanted to shirk my responsibilities and hide like a turtle in its shell. I had been such a coward, completely devoid of humanity! When faced with adversity, I protected myself and disregarded the church’s work, showing my selfish and despicable nature. If I didn’t make amends, I would definitely incur God’s hatred and spurning. I couldn’t follow the flesh or be a coward anymore. No matter how dangerous the environment became or how great the difficulties were, I had to apply myself to the fullest to uphold the church’s work. This is the loyalty and submission that a created being should have, and it is testimony of triumphing over Satan. I was willing to stay and work with the sisters to handle the aftermath.

Later, the brothers and sisters read a passage of God’s words to me, addressing my state. Almighty God says: “Antichrists do their utmost to protect their safety. What they think to themselves is: ‘I absolutely must guarantee my safety. No matter who gets caught, it mustn’t be me.’ … If a place is safe, then antichrists will choose that place to work, and, indeed, they will seem very proactive and positive, showing off their great ‘sense of responsibility’ and ‘loyalty.’ If some work does entail risk and is liable to meet with incident, to get its doer found out by the great red dragon, they make their excuses and refuse it, and find a chance to flee from it. As soon as there is danger, or as soon as there is a hint of danger, they think of ways to extricate themselves and abandon their duty, without a care for the brothers and sisters. They care only about getting themselves out of danger. They may already be prepared at heart: As soon as danger appears, they drop the work they are doing at once, without a care for how the church’s work goes, or for what loss it may incur to the interests of God’s house, or for the safety of the brothers and sisters. What matters to them is fleeing. … These people are unwilling to suffer persecution for believing in God; they are afraid of being arrested, tortured, and convicted. The fact is that they have long since succumbed to Satan in their hearts. They are terrified of the power of the satanic regime, and more afraid still of such things as torture and harsh interrogation befalling them. With antichrists, therefore, if all is smooth sailing, and there is no threat at all to their safety or issue with it, and no hazard is possible, they may offer up their zeal and ‘loyalty,’ and even their assets. But if circumstances are bad and they could be arrested at any time for believing in God and doing their duty, and if their belief in God may get them fired from their official position or abandoned by those close to them, then they will be exceptionally careful, neither preaching the gospel and testifying to God nor doing their duty. When there is a slight sign of trouble, they shrink back like a turtle hiding in its shell; when there is a slight sign of trouble, they wish immediately to return to the church their books of God’s words and anything related to belief in God, in order to keep themselves safe and unharmed. Are they not dangerous? If arrested, would they not become Judas? The antichrists are so dangerous that they may become Judas at any time; there is always the possibility that they will betray God. Furthermore, they are selfish and despicable to an extreme. This is determined by the antichrists’ nature essence” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Two)). God exposes that antichrists, in order to protect themselves, want to abandon their duties when faced with danger. They disregard the church’s work and only think about getting out alive. Such people are selfish and despicable. I realized my behavior mirrored that of an antichrist. When there was no danger, I could proactively do my duties. But when many leaders and workers were arrested, some became Judas, and I was also sold out, I became timid and fearful, wishing to leave this dangerous place as soon as possible. I saw that I was truly selfish and despicable, always considering my own physical interests, and that I didn’t think about working with the sisters as one to handle the aftermath and minimize the losses. In my duties, I lacked all loyalty and revealed the selfish and despicable disposition of an antichrist. Without the exposure of God’s words, I wouldn’t have recognized that this was an antichrist disposition.

Later, I read a passage of God’s words, which brought some clarity to my heart. Almighty God says: “People like this are just timid, and we can’t definitely label them as antichrists based solely on this manifestation, but what is the nature of this manifestation? The essence of this manifestation is that of a disbeliever. They don’t believe that God can protect people’s safety, and they certainly don’t believe that dedicating oneself to expending for God is devoting oneself to the truth, and that it is something God approves of. They don’t fear God in their hearts; they are only afraid of Satan and wicked political parties. They don’t believe in God’s existence, they don’t believe that everything is in God’s hands, and they certainly don’t believe that God will approve of a person expending everything for His sake, and for the sake of following His way, and completing His commission. They can’t see any of this. What do they believe in? They believe that if they fall into the hands of the great red dragon, they’ll meet with a bad end, that they could be sentenced or even risk losing their lives. In their hearts, they only consider their own safety and not the work of the church. Aren’t these disbelievers?” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Two)). God’s words exposed my true state. I always claimed to believe in Almighty God, but when faced with the CCP’s arrests, I didn’t truly believe that everything was in God’s hands, much less believe in God’s unique authority. Upon learning that I had been sold out by a Judas and was being hunted by the police, I feared being captured, maimed, or beaten to death, and even felt a desire to betray God. Through the revelations of facts, I saw just how timid and cowardly I truly was, and that I lacked any understanding of God’s authority. I acted as if my life were in Satan’s hands. I was so terrified by the CCP’s large-scale arrests that I completely lost my nerve. I’d been so pathetic! In reality, no matter what methods or advanced technology the CCP uses to monitor or capture me, without God’s permission, their schemes cannot succeed. I recalled one day in 2021, when I was about to visit a sister’s house for a meeting. Just as I was about to go upstairs, I remembered an urgent matter in the church and decided not to go up. The next day, I found out the police had raided her home at that very moment. Without God’s protection, I would have fallen into the police’s hands. Similarly, though I’d been sold out by Judases and the CCP knew I was a church leader and was using high-tech surveillance to track me, I knew that without God’s permission, no matter how the great red dragon tried every possible way to capture me, its efforts would all be in vain. If God permitted, I wouldn’t be able to escape even if I tried. My life and death are in His hands, not Satan’s. When faced with danger, my desire to flee stemmed from my excessive fear of death and greed for life. I considered my life as most important, thinking that if I lost my life, I couldn’t pursue salvation anymore and that I’d have no good outcome and destination. So, when danger arose, I always wanted to protect my life. The Lord Jesus said: “He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that loses his life for My sake shall find it” (Matthew 10:39). Throughout history, disciples and apostles of the Lord, while spreading the gospel, have been stoned to death and torn apart by horses. Though their bodies died, they bore witness to God before Satan, which is being persecuted for righteousness and commemorated by God. On the other hand, those who, when in danger, betray God, become Judases, or abandon their duties out of their greed for life, might seem alive in the flesh, but they have lost their testimony before God, and God does not commend them. I was fortunate to accept God’s work in the last days, which is a great grace. If God allows me to be captured, I should bear witness to God before Satan without any personal choice, knowing that even if I am captured or die, it will be meaningful and valuable. Later, many church members were betrayed by Judases, and normal gatherings and duties were disrupted. Brothers and sisters lived in fear. Facing such a situation, I was also weak and often prayed to God, asking for faith and courage. I resolved that no matter the difficulties, I would rely on Him to handle the aftermath. One church urgently needed new leaders, and I had to go there and organize an election. Though I had concerns, especially about being tracked by the police’s Skynet surveillance system, and I felt timid and fearful, I remembered God’s words: “Without God’s permission, it is difficult for Satan to touch even a drop of water or grain of sand upon the land; without God’s permission, Satan is not even free to move the ants about upon the land, let alone mankind, who was created by God” (The Word, Vol. 2. On Knowing God. God Himself, the Unique I). God’s words strengthened my faith. Satan is merely a service object in God’s hands, a foil, and I should have no fear. I must pray and rely on God, place myself in His hands, and fulfill my duties. I then relied on God in organizing the election of the church leader, and in practicing this way, I felt peace and stability in my heart.

Through this experience, I gained some understanding of my selfish and despicable corrupt disposition, a truer realization of God’s almightiness and sovereignty, and discernment of the CCP’s essence in resisting God. These are insights I couldn’t have gained in a comfortable environment.