By An Xun, China

In March of 2020, I received a letter from my mother. I found out that she had been cleared out as an evil person from the church over a year ago. This sudden message shook me like a bolt from the blue. I couldn’t even finish reading the letter before the tears started falling from my eyes. God’s salvation work in the last days is a once-in-a-lifetime chance! Since my mother had been cleared out of the church, hasn’t she lost her hope of being saved? At that moment, all that flashed through my mind was how good my mother had been to me: Ever since I was a child, my mother had guided me in reading God’s word and taught me to pray. My father had wanted me to study well and get ahead in the future, but it was my mother who insisted on me believing in God and doing a duty, which allowed me to walk the right path in life. Later, my mother was hunted by the police for spreading the gospel and had to go on the run. Every time she wrote to me, she encouraged me to sincerely do my duty and pursue the truth…. These memories kept replaying in my head like scenes from a movie. My mother had believed in God for sixteen years, and even though she was arrested twice, she didn’t betray God and kept doing her duties away from home, making me believe she truly believed in God. So how could she be cleared out? Had the leader made a mistake? Couldn’t she have another chance to repent, given all her years of sacrifice and expenditure? She said in her letter that she had been perfunctory and running amok in her duties, and that she had been sowing dissent and forming cliques among the brothers and sisters, bringing losses upon the work of the church, and that each time she had been pruned, she had not reflected on or recognized herself, and always thought the problem lay with someone else. She said that she had committed too many evils, and that her being cleared out was justified, that she hadn’t borne any testimony in over a decade of faith, and instead, had committed many evils and harmed the work of the church. She said that she was an old devil, a lackey of Satan, and an evil demon, that her being alive was a mark of shame, and that she was in such pain that she wanted to kill herself. I then thought about how even after my mother had been cleared out, she still sent me the money she had earned from work to support me in my duties. My mother’s behavior confused me: Was it just that her corrupt disposition was too serious, rather than there being something wrong with her essence? If she had another chance, would she be able to repent and avoid being cleared out? God saves people to the greatest extent possible, and God’s house allows for those who have been cleared out to return if they are truly repentant. Seeing as my mother had shown some good behaviors after being cleared out, perhaps the church could give her another chance? So I wrote a letter to help her, asking her to sincerely repent, and that if she truly repented, she may be accepted back into the church.

During a gathering, I mentioned my thoughts and a sister told me that I lacked discernment of my mother’s essence, which was why I always wanted her to be accepted back into the church, and she told me that I needed to seek the truth on this matter. I realized that God was using this sister to remind me to learn a lesson, so I prayed to God, “Oh God, I am confused about my mother being cleared out, please enlighten me to understand the truth and allow me to learn to discern my mother’s nature essence and escape the bonds of feelings.”

One day, I read two passages of God’s words: “Those who give vent to their poisonous, malicious talk within the church, who spread rumors, foment disharmony, and form cliques among the brothers and sisters—they should have been expelled from the church. Yet because now is a different era of God’s work, these people are restricted, for they are decidedly to be eliminated. All who have been corrupted by Satan have corrupt dispositions. Some have nothing more than corrupt dispositions, while others are different: Not only do they have corrupt satanic dispositions, but their nature is also extremely malicious. Not only do their words and actions reveal their corrupt, satanic dispositions; these people are, moreover, the genuine devils and Satans. Their behavior disrupts and disturbs God’s work, it disturbs the brothers’ and sisters’ life entry, and it damages the normal life of the church. Sooner or later, these wolves in sheep’s clothing must be cleansed away; an unsparing attitude, an attitude of rejection, should be adopted toward these lackeys of Satan. Only this is standing on the side of God, and those who fail to do so are wallowing in the mire with Satan” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. A Warning to Those Who Do Not Practice the Truth). “People who genuinely believe in God are those who are willing to put God’s word into practice and are willing to practice the truth. People who are truly able to stand firm in their testimony to God are also those who are willing to put His word into practice and can genuinely stand on the side of the truth. People who resort to trickery and injustice all lack the truth, and they all bring shame to God. Those who cause disputes in the church are Satan’s lackeys, they are the embodiment of Satan. Such people are so malicious. Those who have no discernment and are incapable of standing on the side of the truth all harbor evil intentions and tarnish the truth. More than that, they are the archetypal representatives of Satan. They are beyond redemption, and shall naturally be eliminated. God’s family does not allow those who do not practice the truth to remain, nor does it allow to remain those who deliberately dismantle the church. However, now is not the time to do the work of expulsion; such people will simply be exposed and eliminated in the end. No more useless work is to be expended on these people; those who belong to Satan cannot stand on the side of the truth, whereas those who seek the truth can” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. A Warning to Those Who Do Not Practice the Truth). God’s words of exposure made me understand that only those who can accept and practice the truth truly believe in God, and that those who refuse to accept the truth, consistently commit evils and disturb church work, and never repent, are authentic devils and Satans. They are the ones that God will reveal and eliminate, and the church is to clear them out. This is an administrative decree of the church. From my brothers and sisters, I learned that my mother had been consistently unrepentant in her evil deeds. She had exploited the corruption one sister had revealed to attack and judge her, and she had drawn others in to judge and exclude this sister along with her, causing this sister’s state to deteriorate. My mother hadn’t gotten any results in her duties, and when her team leader pressed her on her progress, she went behind their back and judged them to be unloving. A supervisor fellowshipped and exposed her problems, but she said that they were suppressing her and wouldn’t let her speak. She also voiced her dissatisfaction with the supervisor behind their back, causing others to develop biases against them, causing serious disruptions and disturbances to the work. The leader dissected her actions and conduct, warned her, and arranged for her to reflect in isolation. But my mother didn’t reflect, and instead went to various gatherings as she pleased, sowing discord between the brothers, sisters, and leaders. These facts left me stunned. My mother had such a vicious nature! If anyone did anything even slightly out of line with her wishes, she’d develop a grudge, go behind their back and judge them, sow discontent, and spread discord among the brothers and sisters, disrupting the work of the church. The others had warned her again and again, but she’d been completely unrepentant, consistently committed evil, and disturbed the church’s work and the brothers’ and sisters’ life entry. This wasn’t a normal revelation of corruption, nor was it a problem of a serious corrupt disposition as I had thought, rather, she had a vicious nature, and her essence as an evil person had been revealed. She wouldn’t repent even if given another chance. The church had cleared her out according to principles to protect the church’s work and the brothers and sisters from further disturbance. Handling things in this way was completely just and in line with the truth principles. I always thought with sixteen years of faith, many years out doing duties, her continued belief even after being arrested twice, her forsaking of family and career, and all her effort and expenditure, she was a true believer. But now I saw clearly that my mother only believed in God to sneak into the church and gain blessings, and that she wanted to exchange her ostensible forsaking and sacrifices for the blessings of heaven. Almighty God has expressed so many truths, but she didn’t accept or practice a single one. Instead, she committed evil and caused disturbances in the church, and stubbornly refused to repent. This is an evil person. How is this any different from the Pharisees, who refused to accept the truths expressed by the Lord Jesus, and who nailed the Lord Jesus to the cross, despite traveling the world to convert people? I recalled something the Lord Jesus said: “Not every one that said to Me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that follows the will of My Father which is in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, and in Your name have cast out devils, and in Your name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess to them, I never knew you: depart from Me, you that work iniquity” (Matthew 7:21–23). God’s words made me understand, that a person can make outward sacrifices and efforts, but this doesn’t mean they are true believers, and God does not recognize this kind of faith. Only those who accept and practice the truth are true believers. Such people have a hope of casting off their corrupt dispositions, attaining God’s salvation, and entering God’s kingdom. I also wondered whether my mother’s recognition of her evil deeds and herself as a devil and a Satan after her being cleared out constituted true repentance and whether this was enough for the church to allow her back in.

In my seeking, I read these words of God: “Regardless of how angry God had been with the Ninevites, as soon as they declared a fast and donned sackcloth and ashes, His heart began to soften and He began to change His mind. When He proclaimed to them that He would destroy their city—the moment prior to their confession and repentance for their sins—God was still angry with them. Once they had carried out a series of repentant acts, God’s anger for the people of Nineveh gradually transformed into mercy and tolerance for them. There is nothing contradictory about the coinciding revelation of these two aspects of God’s disposition in the same event. So, how should one understand and know this lack of contradiction? God expressed and revealed each of these two polar-opposite essences before and after the people of Nineveh repented, allowing people to see the realness and the unoffendableness of God’s essence. God used His attitude to tell people the following: It is not that God does not tolerate people, or that He does not want to show mercy to them; rather, it is that they rarely truly repent to God, and it is rare that people truly turn away from their evil ways and abandon the violence in their hands. In other words, when God is angry with man, He hopes that man will be able to truly repent, and indeed He hopes to see man’s true repentance, in which case He will then liberally continue to bestow His mercy and tolerance upon man. This is to say that man’s evil conduct incurs God’s wrath, whereas God’s mercy and tolerance are bestowed upon those who listen to God and truly repent before Him, upon those who can turn away from their evil ways and abandon the violence in their hands. God’s attitude was very clearly revealed in His treatment of the Ninevites: God’s mercy and tolerance are not at all difficult to obtain, and what He requires is one’s true repentance. As long as people turn away from their evil ways and abandon the violence in their hands, God will change His heart and His attitude toward them” (The Word, Vol. 2. On Knowing God. God Himself, the Unique II). “When you see how devils and Satans in the world defy God, you are seeing how devils and Satan in the spiritual realm defy God—there is no difference at all. They come from the same source and possess the same nature essence, and that’s why they do the same things. Regardless of what form they take, they all do the same things. … If they attack God and blaspheme against God, then they are devils, and not humans. In human skin, however good-sounding or correct the things they say are, their nature essence is that of devils. Devils can say things that sound good to mislead people, yet they don’t accept the truth at all, much less do they put it into practice—this is absolutely the case. Look at those evil people and antichrists and at those who defy and betray God—are they not this type of person? … Tell Me, is it appropriate to allow these people who are of devils, or these people with the nature essence of devils, to remain in God’s house? (No, it isn’t.) No, it isn’t. They’re not the same as God’s chosen people: God’s chosen people belong to God, whereas these people belong to the devils and Satan” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (4)). Thinking on God’s words made me understand about the people of Nineveh, who due to their evil deeds, aroused God’s anger and faced destruction. But because they could “turn away from their evil ways and abandon the violence in their hands,” and because they truly repented, they were able to receive God’s mercy and forgiveness. Only when you truly reflect on, recognize, regret, and hate the evil path you were once walking, and once you are able to listen to God’s word and start anew, and stop walking the evil path you were on, are you able to gain God’s mercy and forgiveness. Just saying words that sound good without accepting or practicing the truth does not constitute true repentance, and God will show no mercy or forgiveness toward such people. I looked into my mother’s behavior and found that she still had no recognition of all the serious evils she had committed. Instead, she shifted the blame onto others, saying that back then a sister had despised the supervisor, often picked on their faults and gossiped about their flaws, and that because she herself had no discernment, she sided with this sister in doing evil. My mother still had no understanding at all of all the evil she had done or her insidious and malicious satanic nature, and she felt no real regret or hatred toward these things, so how could she truly repent? If she were to be accepted back, she would just keep doing evil and disturbing church work as before. Also, though she recognized herself as an old devil, a lackey of Satan, and an evil demon, on the matters of the exact evils she had done, why she had done them, what intentions were controlling her, which satanic poisons she was following, and what satanic disposition was involved, she had no real reflection or understanding. I thought back on all the correct things my mother told me growing up, like how precious God’s salvation work in the last days is, and that sincerely doing a duty and pursuing the truth is the right path in life but though she’d been saying these things for over a decade, she hadn’t accepted or practiced any truth. She verbally acknowledged her evil deeds and was able to say correct things, but this didn’t mean that she had truly repented. The church allows for those who have shown true repentance to return, but not people like my mother, who only made verbal acknowledgments and didn’t truly change.

Later, I read another passage of God’s words: “Regardless of whether you are an antichrist or an evil person, or whether you have been cleared out or expelled, fulfilling your responsibilities as a person is something you ought to do. Why do I say that it’s something you ought to do? You have received such a great supply of truths from God, and this is also God’s painstaking efforts. God’s house has watered you and provided for you for so many years, but does God demand anything from you? No. All the various books distributed by God’s house are free, no one has to spend a single penny. Likewise, the true way of eternal life and the words of life that God bestows upon people are free, and the sermons and fellowships of God’s house are all free for people to listen to. Therefore, whether you are an ordinary person or a member of a special group, you have received so many truths from God for free, that surely it’s only right you should preach God’s words and God’s gospel to people and bring people into the presence of God, is it not? God has bestowed all truths unto humankind; who can afford to repay such great love? God’s grace, God’s words, and God’s life are priceless, and no human being can afford to repay them! Is the life of man that precious? Can it be worth as much as the truth? Therefore, no one can afford to repay God’s love and grace, and that includes those who have been cleared out, expelled, and eliminated by the church—they are no exception. As long as you have some conscience, reason, and humanity, then no matter how God’s house treats you, you should fulfill your obligation to spread God’s words and bear witness to His work. This is people’s unshirkable responsibility. Therefore, no matter how many people you preach God’s words and spread the gospel to, or how many people you gain, this is nothing to compliment you on. God has expressed so many truths and yet you don’t listen to them or accept them. Surely rendering a little service and preaching the gospel to others is what you ought to be doing, isn’t it? Given that you have come this far today, shouldn’t you repent? Shouldn’t you look for opportunities to repay God’s love? You really should! God’s house has administrative decrees, and clearing people out, expelling them, and eliminating them are things that are done according to the administrative decrees and according to God’s requirements—doing these things is correct. Some people may say, ‘It’s somewhat embarrassing to accept into the church people gained by the gospel preaching of those who have been cleared out or expelled.’ In actual fact, this is the duty that people should do, and there is nothing to be embarrassed about. People are all created beings. Even if you have been cleared out or expelled, condemned as an evil person or an antichrist, or you are a target for being eliminated, are you not still a created being? Once you are cleared out, isn’t God still your God? Are the words God has spoken to you and the things God has provided you with erased in one fell swoop? Do they stop existing? They do still exist, it’s just that you haven’t cherished them. All converted people, no matter who converted them, are created beings and should submit themselves before the Creator. Therefore, if these people who have been cleared out or expelled are willing to preach the gospel, we will not restrict them; but no matter how they preach, the principles of God’s house for using people and the administrative decrees of God’s house are inalterable, and this will never, ever change” (The Word, Vol. 5. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers (6)). God’s words made me understand that God has expressed so many words and has always been doing the work of saving people This salvation is given to us for free, and it is only natural that we do our duties. Though my mother had been cleared out, she was still a created being, and relied on God every day for food, water, and air to live. God had not stripped her of her right to eat and drink His word. She had been willing to spread the gospel and gave me money to support me in my duties, which was just fulfilling some of her responsibilities, but she hadn’t truly repented, and in considering principles, she was not suited to return. I used to be muddleheaded, didn’t seek the truth, and had no understanding of God’s disposition. I saw that my mother had some good conduct and that she was able to say some correct things, so I always hoped that the church would be able to take her back. I was so muddleheaded! I also asked myself, if somebody else were to have been cleared out, would I have hoped for them to be accepted back? I wouldn’t. Why had I been hoping for my mother to be given another chance and accepted back after she had been cleared out? What was the root of this problem? I read a passage of God’s words: “The final part of God’s words lays bare mankind’s greatest weakness—they all live in a state of feelings—and so God does not avoid a single one of them, and exposes the secrets hidden in the hearts of all mankind. Why is it so hard for people to separate themselves from their feelings? Does doing so surpass the standards of conscience? Can conscience fulfill God’s will? Can feelings help people through adversity? In God’s eyes, feelings are His enemy—has this not been clearly stated in God’s words?” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Interpretations of the Mysteries of “God’s Words to the Entire Universe,” Chapter 28). God exposes that feelings are His enemy, that they are humans’ greatest weakness, that living in feelings will prevent you from viewing things and people with principles, and that living this way will make you prone to disrupting and disturbing the work of the church. Before, I was unaware of how strong my feelings were. In the last few years, people around me had been revealed as evil people and antichrists, and I was able to evaluate and expose their problems truthfully. Because of this, I felt I still had a sense of justice, but my mother being cleared out revealed me completely. My mother had committed so many evils, and yet I didn’t hate her. On the contrary, I felt sad and wept whenever I thought of her being cleared out, and I felt a deep pain at her losing her chance at salvation, to the point of doubting if the leaders and workers had made a mistake in clearing her out, and I felt wronged on her behalf. Seeing my mother showing some good behaviors and no outward stubbornness or resistance to being cleared out, I always hoped that the church would take her back. Though I didn’t plea for leniency on her behalf, in my thinking I was standing in opposition to God. If not for the judgment and exposure of God’s words and the revelation of facts which allowed me to see her essence clearly, I really would have pled for leniency on her behalf, and I would have stood on the side of an evil person and resisted God. On reflection, I finally recognized that these satanic poisons like “Blood is thicker than water,” and “Man is not inanimate; how can he be free from feelings?” had been rooted deep within my heart, making me live by feelings and unable to tell good from evil. No matter what evil my mother had done, I still thought she was a good person, and the person closest to me. I felt that I’d be indebted to her and unable to live with myself if I didn’t take her side. Thinking on it now, from a young age, my mother had read God’s word with me, taught me to pray, urged me to sincerely do my duty and pursue the truth, and sent me money to support me in doing my duty away from home. These and other such things were just her fulfilling her responsibilities as a mother, and this was also God’s sovereignty and arrangement. I thought about all the years I believed in God in a citadel of demons ruled by the CCP. I faced danger so many times, but it was God who watched over and saw me through difficulties. Also, my brothers and sisters with whom I share no blood ties risked themselves to protect me when I was in danger of being arrested. I was arrested twice while doing my duty and acquired a criminal record, but it was my brothers and sisters who took me in and cared for me as if I were their own blood. This was all because of God’s love, so I should thank God and repay His love! My mother is an evil person, has already disturbed the church’s work so much, and she still hasn’t truly repented, even after being cleared out. Without discerning her, I still wanted the church to give her another chance and take her back. I had absolutely no consideration for the interests of God’s house or for the life entry of the brothers or sisters. Was I not just being an accomplice to an evil person and resisting and opposing God? I was being conscientious and loving toward an evil person, which is disloyal to God, cruel to brothers and sisters, and devoid of humanity. I saw that I was living by satanic poisons, and that I was a fool lacking in discernment and the ability to tell good from evil. I almost stood on the side of Satan and opposed God. I was in such grave danger! Realizing these things, I finally understood first-hand what God meant in “feelings are His enemy.” These words are so practical and true! Later, I read another passage of God’s words: “You must cast aside your feelings as soon as you can; I do not act out of feelings, but exercise righteousness instead. If your parents do anything that is of no benefit to the church, they cannot escape” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Utterances of Christ in the Beginning, Chapter 9). It is precisely because God upholds righteousness instead of acting on feelings and the truth and righteousness reign in the house of God, that those antichrists and evil people who unrepentantly disturb and tear down God’s work and harm brothers and sisters can be cleared out, that all the church work can proceed smoothly, and that brothers and sisters can have a normal church life and environment in which to do duties. God demands that we avoid relying on feelings in our speech and actions, and that we rely on principles instead. This is also how we should treat our parents, and this is the truth I should put into practice. Though my mother physically birthed me, she is an evil person in essence, an enemy of God, and she is hated by God. I must be principled in this matter, stand by God, and not rely on feelings to speak on her behalf.

Later, I read another passage of God’s words that allowed me to understand how I should treat my mother. God says: “Suppose your parents hinder your belief in God, their nature essence is that of disbelievers and nonbelievers, or even of evil people and devils, and they are not on the same path as you. In other words, they are not the same kind of person as you at all, and though you lived in the same household as them for many years, they simply do not have the same pursuits or character as you do, and they certainly do not have the same preferences or aspirations as you. You believe in God, and they do not believe in God at all, and they even resist God. What should be done in these circumstances? (Reject them.) God has not told you to reject them or curse them in these circumstances. God did not say that. God’s requirement of ‘honoring one’s parents’ still stands. This means that while you are living with your parents, you should still uphold this requirement of honoring your parents. There is no contradiction in this matter, is there? (No.) There is no contradiction in this at all. In other words, when you do manage to return home for a visit, you can cook them a meal or make them some dumplings, and if possible, you can buy them some health products, and they will be very satisfied with you. … There must be principles to how you treat all people, including your parents; regardless of whether they believe in God or not, and regardless of whether or not they are evil people, you must treat them with principles. God has told man this principle: It is about treating others fairly—it is just that people have an extra degree of responsibility toward their parents. All you need to do is fulfill this responsibility. Regardless of whether your parents are believers or not, regardless of whether they pursue their belief or not, regardless of whether their outlook on life and their humanity line up with yours or not, you just need to fulfill your responsibility to them. You do not need to avoid them—just let everything take its natural course, according to God’s orchestrations and arrangements. If they hinder your belief in God, then you should still fulfill your filial responsibilities to the best of your ability, so that your conscience at least does not feel indebted to them. If they do not hinder you, and they support your belief in God, then you should also practice according to the principles, treating them well when it is fitting to do so” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (4)). God’s words brightened my heart and made me understand the principles to treat family members. My mother is an evil person in essence, and we are on different paths. I shouldn’t act by relying on feelings, but rather, principles. However, she did raise me, shared the gospel with me, and to this day, supports me in my faith, and so long as it doesn’t interfere with my duties, I can still care for her and fulfill my responsibilities as her child.

The matter of my mother being cleared out revealed just how blinded and overly sentimental I was. It was God’s words that guided me to discern my mother’s essence as an evil person and allowed me to know what stance I should take. It also made the dangers and consequences of being too sentimental totally clear to me, preventing me from doing anything disruptive. I thank Almighty God from the bottom of my heart!