By Jing Ru, China

In 2017, I was responsible for the cleansing work in the church. On July 2, many leaders and workers and brothers and sisters were arrested. At that time, there were some report letters in the church that needed to be handled urgently, but the few people prepared to handle them were all arrested. Sister Yang Chen, who had been responsible for this work, was also arrested. The upper leaders arranged for me to handle the report letters, and I felt somewhat reluctant, thinking to myself, “These people were all monitored and captured by the police because they kept going out to do their duties. There are surveillance devices everywhere, and some are even equipped with facial recognition capabilities. If I accept this duty, I’d have to meet with brothers and sisters often, and even come into contact with some people who have safety risks. If I’m identified by the surveillance equipment, it’ll be easy for the police to follow and capture me. The CCP treats believers in God as serious criminals against the state, so if I end up getting arrested, even if I won’t be beaten to death, I’ll at least be crippled. If I end up with aftereffects, then my later years won’t only involve physical suffering, but I’ll also have to endure others’ disdain and cold remarks.” I also thought about how the police use all kinds of tortures to torment brothers and sisters, and about how their methods are absolutely brutal. I was small in stature, and if I couldn’t withstand the torture and became a Judas, then I’d have no chance of being saved and would also be punished. The more I thought about it, the more afraid I became, and I felt that doing this duty was too dangerous. I thought that my current duty was better, as I didn’t need to go out for it and it was safer. With this in mind, I wanted to decline the duty, but just excusing myself directly from this duty would show I lacked reason, so I replied to the upper leaders, saying that my caliber was poor, that I couldn’t discern people, that my work efficiency was low, and that having me handle this would delay the work. A few days later, the leaders sent me a letter to fellowship God’s intention with me, saying that there was an urgent need for someone to handle the report letters, and that they hoped I could consider God’s intention. I couldn’t shirk this duty anymore, so I reluctantly agreed to do it, but I still complained somewhat inwardly, wondering, “Why am I being assigned such a dangerous duty?” But then I thought about how I had no criminal record with the CCP, and that currently, I was the most suitable person. The leaders had made this arrangement based on a comprehensive assessment of my actual situation, which was why they arranged for me to do this duty, but why did I always want to shirk it and turn it down? I realized that my state wasn’t right, so I prayed to God, asking Him to lead me to understand His intention.

I read two passages of God’s words: “Perhaps you all remember these words: ‘For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, works for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.’ You have all heard these words before, yet none of you understood their true meaning. Today, you are profoundly aware of their true significance. These words shall be fulfilled by God during the last days, and they shall be fulfilled in those who have been brutally persecuted by the great red dragon in the land where it lies coiled. The great red dragon persecutes God and is the enemy of God, and so, in this land, people are subjected to humiliation and persecution because of their belief in God, and these words are fulfilled in you, this group of people, as a result” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Is the Work of God As Simple As Man Imagines?). “Blessings cannot be obtained in a day or two; they must be earned through many prices. Which is to say, you must possess a love that has undergone refinement, you must possess great faith, and you must have the many truths that God requires you to attain; what is more, you must turn toward justice, without being cowed or evasive, and must have a God-loving heart that is constant unto death. You must have resolve, changes must occur in your life disposition, your corruption must be healed, you must accept all of God’s orchestrations without complaint, and you must be submissive even unto death. This is what you ought to attain, this is the final aim of God’s work, and it is what God asks of this group of people. Since He gives to you, He will surely ask of you in return, and will surely make fitting demands of you. Therefore, there is reason to all the work God does, which shows why, time and time again, God does work that sets high standards and strict requirements. It is because of this that you should be filled with faith in God. In short, all the work of God is done for your sake, so that you may become worthy of receiving His inheritance. Instead of saying that it is for the sake of God’s own glory, it would be better to say that it is for the sake of your salvation and for the sake of perfecting this group of people who have been so profoundly afflicted in the unclean land. You should understand the intention of God” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Is the Work of God As Simple As Man Imagines?). God’s words made me understand that the essence of the great red dragon is hatred for God, and that it has always opposed God, using high-tech means to monitor, track, and capture Christians, trying every means to obstruct and persecute God’s chosen people, and vainly attempting to eradicate God’s church. But God uses the persecution of the great red dragon to perfect our faith and love. I thought of the apostles throughout the ages. They suffered slander and ridicule from the world for propagating God’s gospel, but they didn’t abandon God’s commission even when their lives were at stake. These people truly followed God. Reflecting on myself, when I had seen my brothers and sisters being arrested, with some even being tortured, I had become timid and afraid, and to protect my life I had wanted to shirk my duty by not handling the report letters, without any consideration for the interests of the church. I had been truly selfish and despicable, with no humanity at all! Now, even though I hadn’t been arrested, I was so scared that I didn’t even have the courage to do my duty. Had I not just become a coward, craving life and fearing death? In what way was I a believer in God? The Book of Revelation states that the cowardly cannot enter the gates of the kingdom of heaven, so if I continued to be so cowardly and didn’t dare to do my duty, wanting to save myself out of fear for my life, I would ultimately be eliminated. At this moment, I finally understood that God was using this environment to perfect my faith and cleanse my corruption, and that this was all for the sake of my salvation.

I then read another passage of God’s words: “Back when God sent Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, what was Moses’ reaction to God’s having given him such a commission? (He said he was not eloquent, but slow of speech and tongue.) He had that one, slight misgiving, that he was not eloquent, but slow of speech and tongue. But was he resistant to God’s commission? How did he treat it? He fell down prostrate. What does it mean to fall down prostrate? It means to submit and accept. He prostrated his whole self before God, heedless of his personal preferences, and did not mention any difficulties he might have had. Whatever God would have him do, he would do it at once. … What does it mean that he set off? It means that he had real trust in God, true reliance on Him, and true submission to Him. He was not cowardly, and he did not make a choice of his own or try to refuse. Instead, he fully believed, and he set off to act with God’s commission upon him, filled with trust. He believed this: ‘If God has commissioned this, then it will all be done as God says. God has told me to bring the Israelites out of Egypt, so I will go. Since this is what God has commissioned, He will go to work, and He will give me strength. I need only cooperate.’ This is the insight Moses had. People who lack spiritual understanding think that they can do the things God entrusts them with on their own. Do people have such abilities? Absolutely not. If people are cowardly, they will lack even the courage to meet the Egyptian Pharaoh. In their hearts, they will say: ‘The Egyptian Pharaoh is a devil king. He has an army at his command and could kill me with one word. How can I lead away so many Israelites? Would the Egyptian Pharaoh listen to me?’ These words constitute refusal, resistance, and rebellion. They demonstrate no belief in God, and this is not real trust. Circumstances at the time were not favorable for the Israelites or for Moses. Leading the Israelites out of Egypt was, in the human view, simply an impossible task, because Egypt was cut off by the Red Sea, and crossing that would be a great challenge. Could Moses really not have known how difficult it would be to fulfill this commission? In his heart, he knew, yet he said only that he was slow of speech and tongue, that no one would heed his words. He did not, at heart, reject God’s commission. When God told Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, he lay prostrate and accepted it. Why did he not mention the difficulties? Was it that, after forty years in the wilderness, he did not know the perils of the world of men, or the state to which things had progressed in Egypt, or the current plight of the Israelites? Could he not see those things clearly? Is that what was happening? Certainly not. Moses was intelligent and wise. He knew all those things, having personally undergone and experienced them in the world of men, and he would never forget them. He knew those things all too well. So, did he know how difficult the commission was that God had given him? (Yes.) If he knew, how was he able to accept that commission? He trusted in God. With his lifetime of experience, he believed in God’s almightiness, so he accepted this commission of God with a heart full of trust and without the slightest doubt” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only With True Submission Can One Have Real Trust). God commanded Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. At that time, the Egyptian Pharaoh was supremely powerful and very cruel. Moses had nothing at all, but he was able to obey God’s command. He had genuine faith in God, and believed that everything was in God’s hands, and that no force could obstruct what God wanted to accomplish. He had no fear or worry in his heart. The facts confirmed that throughout the entire process, God’s work was done by God Himself. God brought down ten plagues, parted the Red Sea, and ultimately led Moses to bring the Israelites out of Egypt. Moses saw God’s great power through experiencing these events, so his faith in God increased even more. In contrast to Moses’ faith in God, I felt truly ashamed. The leader had arranged for me to handle the report letters, but I was afraid of being monitored and arrested, and so I couldn’t simply submit and accept this duty. I viewed these high-tech tools as being very powerful, feeling as if it would be all too easy to get caught by the police. I’d often say that everything is in God’s hands and that I should trust God’s authority, but now when the facts were confronting me, I was cowardly and afraid, with no faith at all. I realized that I didn’t know God’s sovereignty at all. Although there were surveillance cameras with facial recognition capabilities everywhere, whether I would be captured depended on God’s sovereignty and arrangements. Realizing this gave me faith and I was willing to rely on God to get through this.

While handling the report letters, a church leader took us to meet with brothers and sisters every day to look into the matters, and although the environment was dangerous, we prayed and relied on God, and we successfully handled the report letters. We learned only after leaving this church that the police had already put up this leader’s photo on public bulletin boards to capture him, but he hid in time and wasn’t captured. I saw that God’s work is protected by God Himself, and that He is also protecting us. Through this experience, I gained some faith.

Fast forward to March 2020, when I learned that Yang Chen had been tortured by the police after being arrested, and had died shortly after being released on bail. Soon afterward, I also heard that the CCP was about to carry out a massive crackdown on believers in late May. During a gathering, the leader told us that there were several report letters that urgently needed to be handled, but that they hadn’t found anyone to do it yet. When the leader spoke, she looked at me. My heart skipped a beat and I thought, “Whatever you do, just don’t ask me to handle the report letters. The CCP will start another massive crackdown in May, and in recent years, to capture believers, many more surveillance cameras have been added to the streets and alleys. If I keep moving around outside, the possibility of me being arrested is very high. Yang Chen was tortured to death by the police at such a young age; I’m more than 10 years older than Yang Chen, so if I were to be captured, I’d be even less able to withstand the torture. Even if I weren’t killed, I’d likely be crippled.” Thinking of this made me feel somewhat afraid. At that moment, the leader asked me, “You have handled report letters before, so I want you to go this time as well. What do you think?” Although I knew in my heart that shirking my duty wasn’t in accordance with God’s intentions, I thought that this duty really was too dangerous, so I made an excuse to shirk it, saying, “Sister Shen Ran has discernment and knows how to fellowship well. You can arrange for her to go. She just so happens to be at a church nearby, so it’d be convenient for her to go.” But the leader said that Shen Ran hadn’t handled report letters before, and asked me to go with her, so I had no choice but to agree. After that, I arranged to meet brothers and sisters with Shen Ran to verify the report letters, and we quickly handled three report letters.

Later, I reflected on myself, and wondered, “Why do I always think of myself first when faced with dangerous duties and even want to shirk my duty? What am I being controlled by?” Later, I read this passage of God’s words: “Satan corrupts people through the education and influence of national governments and of the famous and great. Their devilish words have become man’s life and nature. ‘Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost’ is a well-known satanic saying that has been instilled into everyone, and this has become man’s life. There are other words of philosophies for worldly dealings that are also like this. Satan uses each nation’s traditional culture to educate, mislead, and corrupt people, causing mankind to fall into and be engulfed by a boundless abyss of destruction, and in the end, people are destroyed by God because they serve Satan and resist God. … Mankind has been profoundly corrupted by Satan. Satan’s venom flows through the blood of every person, and it can be said that man’s nature is corrupt, wicked, antagonistic, and in opposition to God, filled by and immersed in the philosophies and poisons of Satan. It has become, entirely, the nature essence of Satan. This is why people resist God and stand in opposition to God” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. How to Know Man’s Nature). From the exposure of God’s words, I realized that time and again I tried to preserve myself by shirking my duty. This was because the satanic poisons of “Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost,” and “A bad life is better than a good death,” had deeply rooted themselves in my heart and had long since become my nature. Whenever anything involved my interests, I couldn’t help but consider myself. During dire situations, the report letters piled up, and the leader had arranged for me to do this duty, but I thought about my interests constantly. I was afraid of being captured, crippled, or beaten to death, with no good outcome or destination, so I made excuses to shirk my duty and even complained that the leader didn’t arrange for others to handle it. I thought about how Sister Shen Ran had safety risks but was still willing to do this duty, while I just wanted to stay home, believing that this would lower my chances of being captured. I was truly selfish and despicable, with no humanity at all! I’d enjoyed the watering and supply of God’s words, enjoying so much of God’s love, so at critical moments, I should have done my duty well to repay God, and cleared out the antichrists, evil people, and disbelievers from the church as soon as possible, allowing brothers and sisters to have a good church life and a place to do their duties. But I gave no thought to the interests of the church or to the life entry of the brothers and sisters, only considering my safety. Wasn’t I betraying God? I was truly unworthy of living in God’s presence! Realizing this, I no longer wanted to continue living in my corrupt disposition and rebelling against God. I sought a path of practice in God’s words to resolve my corrupt disposition.

I read these passages of God’s words: “God regards you as a member of His house and as a part of the expansion of His work. At this point, you have the duty that you ought to perform. Whatever you are capable of doing, whatever you are able to achieve, they are your responsibilities and your duty. It can be said that they are God’s commission, your mission, and your bounden duty. Duties come from God; they are the responsibilities and commissions that God entrusts to man. How, then, should man understand them? ‘Since this is my duty and the commission that God has entrusted to me, it is my obligation and responsibility. It is only right that I accept it as my bounden duty. I can’t decline or refuse it; I can’t pick and choose. What falls to me is certainly what I ought to do. It’s not that I’m not entitled to make a choice—it’s that I shouldn’t make a choice. This is the reason that a created being ought to have.’ This is an attitude of submission” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Part Three). “No matter what God asks of you, you need only work toward it with all your strength, and I hope you will be able to come before God and give Him your utmost devotion in the end. As long as you can see God’s gratified smile as He sits upon His throne, even if this moment is the appointed time of your death, you should be able to laugh and smile as you close your eyes. You must, during your time on earth, do your final duty for God. In the past, Peter was crucified upside down for the sake of God; but you should satisfy God in the end, and exhaust all your energy for His sake. What can a created being do for God? You should therefore give yourself up to God in advance, for Him to orchestrate you as He wishes. As long as it makes God happy and pleased, then let Him do as He will with you. What right do men have to speak words of complaint?” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Interpretations of the Mysteries of “God’s Words to the Entire Universe,” Chapter 41). Contemplating God’s words, I understood that no matter what duty the house of God arranges for me, it is my responsibility and obligation, and I should accept it as my unavoidable duty. When and what suffering we are to endure is all predetermined by God. If God were to allow me to be captured, then I would be willing to submit to God’s sovereignty without complaint, and even if I were crippled or beaten to death, I would never yield to the great red dragon. I had to stand firm in my testimony to humiliate the great red dragon. I thought of the saints throughout history, who died by being stoned, being torn apart by horses, sawed to death, or hanged, for propagating the gospel of the Lord Jesus. It may have seemed that they died painfully, but their souls didn’t perish, and they used their lives to bear witness to the Lord Jesus, and they were approved by God. In contrast, as a created being enjoying all that God has given, when faced with dangerous situations, I shirked my duties to protect myself. Such a person is a cowardly traitor in God’s eyes, and even if the body struggles on, it is merely a husk. As the Lord Jesus said: “He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that loses his life for My sake shall find it” (Matthew 10:39).

In June 2023, the CCP conducted another campaign of mass arrests, and over a hundred people were arrested in several churches in my hometown. Many brothers and sisters lived in fear and lost their normal church life. In mid-October, an incident involving a false christ misleading people occurred in one of those churches, many brothers and sisters were misled, and due to a Judas’ betrayal, the entire church came under police surveillance. There was an urgent need for someone to handle the aftermath work, and the leaders wanted to arrange for me to go. Thinking of how dire the situation was in that church, I felt that the chances of being captured while handling the aftermath work were too high, and I felt somewhat timid and afraid. However, recalling my previous experiences, I realized this was a test from God, to see if I could submit to His orchestrations and arrangements and remain loyal to Him. This time, I didn’t want to disappoint God again, so I accepted this duty. Later, during cooperation, I faced some difficulties, but by relying on God and actually working, I successfully transferred the books of God’s words away, and most of the brothers and sisters who had been misled by the false christ were rescued.

Through this experience, I gained more faith in God, and I also gained some understanding of God’s almightiness and sovereignty, and I realized that the CCP’s rampant actions are in God’s hands. Just as God said: “Without God’s permission, it is difficult for Satan to touch even a drop of water or grain of sand upon the land; without God’s permission, Satan is not even free to move the ants about upon the land, let alone mankind, who was created by God. In the eyes of God, Satan is inferior to the lilies on the mountain, to the birds flying in the air, to the fish in the sea, and to the maggots on the earth. Its role among all things is to serve all things, to serve mankind, and to serve God’s work and His plan of management. Regardless of how malicious its nature, and how evil its essence, the only thing it can do is to dutifully abide by its function: being of service to God, and providing a counterpoint to God. Such is the substance and position of Satan. Its essence is unconnected to life, unconnected to power, unconnected to authority; it is merely a plaything in God’s hands, just a machine in service to God!” (The Word, Vol. 2. On Knowing God. God Himself, the Unique I).