By Han Ming, China

In 1998, I accepted Almighty God’s work of the last days. Later, I was well-known for my faith and became a key surveillance target for the CCP’s police force. In 2016, my wife and I left home and rented a house in another place to do our duties. Later, brothers and sisters from my hometown told me that the police were still looking for me, and they said the police had bribed a neighbor to report me if they saw me. Because of this, we were very cautious while we were elsewhere doing our duties, always on alert, afraid of being monitored and arrested.

One morning in the first half of 2023, Sister Zhang Ning suddenly came to my house with a worried look on her face and said that her partnered sister had been arrested, and that several other brothers and sisters from the church had also been arrested. The police had even gone to a few host homes for questioning. She and Sister Liu Ming had nowhere to go and wanted to stay at my house for a while. Thinking about how they were being hunted and couldn’t return home, I immediately agreed. But two days later, I learned that both of them had been sold out, and that the police had gotten hold of a photo of Liu Ming and were hunting for her. Hearing this made me very nervous, and I felt like China was shrouded in a dark cloud, with no safe place anywhere. I also couldn’t help but worry, thinking, “Since I’m also being hunted by the CCP’s police, isn’t it too dangerous to have these two sisters staying here with me right now? Especially Liu Ming—the police have her photo and are actively tracking her whereabouts. She passed many surveillance cameras on her way to my house, and if the police check the footage, they’ll quickly track her movements and find my home. Then we’d be arrested too!” I also thought about how I’d had high blood pressure and heart disease for many years, and I wondered, “If I end up getting arrested and tortured, will I be able to endure it? If I can’t endure the suffering and betray God, won’t my faith have been in vain? And I would also end up being punished in the future.” The more I thought about it, the more fearful I became, and I felt that I was under immense pressure. At that moment, a thought came to my mind, “If I’d known this would all be so dangerous, I wouldn’t have agreed to host Zhang Ning and Liu Ming. That way, I could have run fewer risks. With the situation so dire right now, the longer they’re here, the more danger I’m in.” After having this thought, when we’d talk, I’d drop hints that my place wasn’t safe, with the intention of getting Zhang Ning and Liu Ming to urge the leaders to find another host home for them as soon as possible. Every time I said these kinds of things, they’d both seem helpless. Afterward, I’d feel guilty, thinking I shouldn’t treat them like that, especially Liu Ming. Her health was already poor, and now she was being hunted. Not long before, her mother had been arrested, and no one knew what had happened to her, and one time, I saw her crying alone in the kitchen. They were in a lot of danger, and I shouldn’t have been pushing them to leave, but when I thought about my own safety, I still hoped for them to leave soon.

During a gathering, I read a passage of God’s word, and it moved me deeply. Almighty God says: “Regardless of how ‘powerful’ Satan is, regardless of how audacious and ambitious it is, regardless of how great is its ability to inflict damage, regardless of how wide-ranging are the techniques with which it corrupts and lures man, regardless of how clever are the tricks and schemes with which it intimidates man, regardless of how changeable is the form in which it exists, it has never been able to create a single living thing, has never been able to set down laws or rules for the existence of all things, and has never been able to rule and control any object, whether animate or inanimate. Within the cosmos and the firmament, there is not a single person or object that was born from it, or exists because of it; there is not a single person or object that is ruled by it, or controlled by it. On the contrary, it not only has to live under the dominion of God, but, moreover, must submit to all of God’s orders and commands. Without God’s permission, it is difficult for Satan to touch even a drop of water or grain of sand upon the land; without God’s permission, Satan is not even free to move the ants about upon the land, let alone mankind, who was created by God. In the eyes of God, Satan is inferior to the lilies on the mountain, to the birds flying in the air, to the fish in the sea, and to the maggots on the earth. Its role among all things is to serve all things, to serve mankind, and to serve God’s work and His plan of management. Regardless of how malicious its nature, and how evil its essence, the only thing it can do is to dutifully abide by its function: being of service to God, and providing a counterpoint to God. Such is the substance and position of Satan. Its essence is unconnected to life, unconnected to power, unconnected to authority; it is merely a plaything in God’s hands, just a machine in service to God!” (The Word, Vol. 2. On Knowing God. God Himself, the Unique I). From God’s words, I saw that Satan renders service to God’s work, and that without God’s permission, it can do nothing. Although the great red dragon seems very savage, it too is in God’s hands. Whether Liu Ming was monitored and tracked when she came here, and whether I would be arrested, were all matters under God’s control, and God would have the final say. Without God’s permission, the police wouldn’t find us. I hadn’t even been arrested yet, but had been so timid and afraid, and I had even thought about refusing to host the two sisters. This showed I had no real faith in God at all. When things befell me, God had no place in my heart. In what way was I someone who truly believed in God? I was practically a disbeliever. I saw that after believing in God for so many years, my stature was still so small, and I hated myself for not pursuing the truth. When situations came upon me, they revealed how pitifully lacking I was in truth realities.

Later, when we gathered together, I read some of God’s words: “In the nation of the great red dragon, I have carried out a stage of work unfathomable to human beings, causing them to sway in the wind, after which many quietly drift away with the blowing of the wind. Truly, this is the ‘threshing floor’ I am about to clear; it is what I yearn for and it is also My plan. For many evil ones have crept in while I am at work, but I am in no hurry to drive them away. Rather, I shall disperse them when the time is right. Only after that shall I be the fountain of life, allowing those who truly love Me to receive from Me the fruit of the fig tree and the fragrance of the lily. In the land where Satan sojourns, the land of dust, there remains no pure gold, only sand, and so, meeting with these circumstances, I do such a stage of work” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. The Seven Thunders Peal—Prophesying That the Gospel of the Kingdom Shall Spread Throughout the Universe). I saw from God’s words that God allows the great red dragon to persecute and arrest God’s chosen people in order to exploit it in the service of testing everyone. In one sense, this is done to perfect a group of people, and in another, it also reveals disbelievers and cowardly people. In the past, I had often said that I would be considerate of God’s intentions, and that I was willing to submit and be loyal to God. I had also said that brothers and sisters should help and love one another, but the facts revealed that I had just been spouting doctrines and slogans, without any reality at all. Zhang Ning and Liu Ming had come to stay at my house, and at first, I had been willing to host them. But after seeing a fair few people being captured, and hearing that the two of them had been sold out, and that the police were hunting Liu Ming, I felt that hosting them carried a very great risk, and that if I were arrested, I would be sentenced to heavy punishment. For the sake of my own protection, I didn’t want to host them anymore. What I had felt in my heart and said with my mouth was intended to get them to leave as soon as possible. I thought about myself. I was also being hunted by the great red dragon and had a home that I couldn’t return to, and when my body suffered pain and my heart was in torment, I also hoped to receive help from others. Now God had prepared a suitable place for me, but when the sisters could no longer return home and had nowhere to go, I disregarded their safety, and constantly wanted to push them away. I realized that I had no love for my brothers and sisters at all. Zhang Ning and Liu Ming did important duties in the church, but at this critical moment, I hadn’t considered how to protect their safety or safeguard the church’s work. In what way did I have any loyalty to God? My nature was so selfish, and I was lacking in humanity! Only now did I realize that the great red dragon renders service to the work of God, and that without this kind of situation, I wouldn’t have recognized my corruptions. Afterward, I resolved to myself that even if one day I really were arrested, I would resolutely stand firm in my testimony and not betray God. So I discussed with Zhang Ning and Liu Ming about how to respond and evacuate if the police came to search the house or if there were any unforeseen circumstances. This made me feel less afraid.

After a while, Zhang Ning and Liu Ming moved away. My younger sister and her husband came to my house to remind me to be careful, saying that the police had been hunting for me, and additionally that the police thought I was a leader, and that if I got caught, I would definitely be sentenced. My heart felt heavy, and I wondered if those who had been arrested and who’d then sold out brothers and sisters had identified me and sold me out. For safety’s sake, I hid all the important things in my house. I thought that if anything happened, I would leave town and go into hiding for a while. Just then, Liu Ming suddenly returned. She hadn’t been able to stay at the host home she had gone to because it was under surveillance. I was shocked, thinking, “Liu Ming is being hunted, and there are cameras everywhere. Now that she has come back after moving away, the police will easily find her whereabouts if she is being monitored. Originally, my place was relatively safe, but if the police use the breadcrumb trail of surveillance footage to track down Liu Ming, won’t that expose my home?” That evening, I prayed to God, “God, Liu Ming has suddenly returned. I worry that if she is being monitored and followed, I could be implicated, and I’m afraid of being arrested. God, please protect my heart and guide me to learn lessons in this environment.” After praying, I felt somewhat more at peace. I was willing to let Liu Ming stay in my home for the time being.

A few days later, I learned that Liu Ming’s mother knew where my home was. A relative of hers who was a believer also knew that Liu Ming was staying at my house. I thought, “No one can be relied upon right now. If this relative gets caught and reveals that Liu Ming is at my home, won’t I be in even more danger?” I began to feel tense again, thinking, “Liu Ming’s safety is at such massive risk, I should have advised her when she left a couple of days ago that since she was leaving, she couldn’t come back, then there would be no need to worry about these risks now.” With that in mind, I asked her to write to the leaders to tell them to hurry up and find a host home for her to move to. But the days passed, and there was still no sign of the leaders coming to take Liu Ming away, so I started to feel anxious. Liu Ming helplessly said, “The whole church environment is pretty dire right now, and it’s hard to find a suitable host home at the moment.” Seeing Liu Ming’s sad expression, I felt remorseful and couldn’t bring myself to send her away. Later, the leaders judged that my place wasn’t safe either, so they moved Liu Ming to another home.

After that, I began to reflect and ponder, asking myself what lessons I had learned from hosting Zhang Ning and Liu Ming on these two occasions. Looking back, what I had revealed on both occasions was cowardice, in wanting to protect myself, and constantly wanting to shirk my duties and being unwilling to host the sisters. So I sought out words of God to read regarding this state. God says: “Antichrists are extremely selfish and despicable. They do not have true faith in God, much less loyalty to God; when they encounter an issue, they only protect and safeguard themselves. For them, nothing is more important than their own safety. As long as they can live and won’t get arrested, they don’t care how much harm is done to the work of the church. These people are extremely selfish, they don’t think of the brothers and sisters at all, or of the work of the church, they only think of their own safety. They are antichrists” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Two)). From the exposure of God’s words, I saw that antichrists are really selfish and despicable. They are only concerned with protecting themselves and their own interests, and they don’t have the slightest regard for protecting the work of the church or the safety of their brothers and sisters. I’d behaved just like an antichrist, only thinking of myself in times of trouble and putting my own interests first, without considering the safety of my brothers and sisters or the work of the church at all. Zhang Ning and Liu Ming were doing text-based duties, which is an important task for the church. Now that the church was facing widespread arrests, many host homes were no longer able to provide shelter. My rented house was relatively safer, so in this kind of situation, I should have found myself honor-bound to receive them so they could have a quiet environment in which to do their duties. Moreover, Liu Ming wasn’t in good health, she was very distressed because her mother had been arrested, and as she herself was being hunted, she had no home to return to, so I ought to have taken her in and taken care of her so that she could feel at home here and do her duties in peace. However, I only thought about whether I might be arrested, whether I could stand firm if I were arrested, and if I could have a good destination afterward, but I didn’t empathize with their circumstances or feelings. To protect my own safety, I even tried to indirectly push them away. I was only considering my own interests, thinking that as long as I was safe, that was all that mattered. I saw that I was the same as those antichrists exposed by God, selfish, despicable, and lacking humanity. I thought of the brothers and sisters in the church, some of whom, in dangerous situations, take in brothers and sisters who are being hunted. They are willing to take risks themselves to protect their brothers and sisters, without the slightest complaint. Some even handle aftermath work despite great danger, transferring the books of God’s words without considering their personal safety, and some step up to protect their brothers and sisters when they are arrested and persecuted. The list of such people continues. These people can rely on God to rebel against their flesh, safeguarding the church’s work, protecting their brothers and sisters, and showing their loyalty to satisfy God. Compared to them, I truly fell short. I also thought of those Judases who sold out the church’s assets and their brothers and sisters after being arrested. They did so because of their utterly selfish nature, and because they feared death and wanted to preserve their lives. When the great red dragon threatened, intimidated, and tortured them, they were unwilling to allow their flesh to suffer and so they followed the great red dragon, betraying and blaspheming God, and offending God’s disposition. I was also selfish in this way, and if I were to be arrested by the great red dragon, I too would have been in danger of betraying God! I had to quickly seek the truth to resolve my state.

In my seeking, I also reflected on myself, asking myself, “Why am I always afraid of being arrested?” In truth, it was because I was afraid that if I died, I wouldn’t have a good outcome or destination afterward. I read these words of God: “Who of the whole of mankind is not cared for in the eyes of the Almighty? Who does not live in the midst of the Almighty’s predestination? Does man’s life and death happen by his own choice? Does man control his own fate? Many people cry out for death, yet it is far away from them; many people want to be those who are strong in life and fear death, yet unbeknownst to them, the day of their demise draws near, plunging them into the abyss of death” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. God’s Words to the Entire Universe, Chapter 11). “How did those disciples of the Lord Jesus die? Among the disciples, there were those who were stoned, dragged behind a horse, crucified upside down, dismembered by five horses—every sort of death befell them. What was the reason for their deaths? Were they lawfully executed for their crimes? No. They were condemned, beaten, scolded, and put to death because they spread the Lord’s gospel and were rejected by the people of the world—that is how they were martyred. … When we mention this topic, you put yourselves in their position, so are your hearts sad, and do you feel a hidden pain? You think, ‘These people did their duty to spread God’s gospel and should be considered good people, so how could they come to such an end and such an outcome?’ Actually, this was how their bodies died and passed away; this was their means of departure from the human world, yet that did not mean their outcome was the same. No matter what the means of their death and departure was nor how it happened, it was not how God defined the final outcomes of those lives, of those created beings. This is something you must see clearly” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Spreading the Gospel Is the Duty to Which All Believers Are Honor-Bound). From God’s words, I saw that each of our lives and deaths is in God’s hands, and that when and how a person dies has already been predestined by God. There are many ways for a person to die, but the value and significance of these deaths vary greatly, and people’s final outcomes and destinations are different. Just like the disciples of the Lord Jesus, who recognized that the Lord Jesus was God incarnate, they were able to be loyal to God until the end, sacrificing their lives to stand firm in their testimony for Him. Many saints throughout the ages have also been martyred for propagating the Lord’s gospel. Their deaths were valuable and meaningful. Although their bodies died in a variety of ways, their souls didn’t die. In the last days, we believe in God and do our duties in this atheistic country, and we will inevitably face persecution and tribulations. We should also follow the example of the saints of the past, and have the determination to follow God even unto death. But in this situation orchestrated by God, I only thought about how to escape and protect myself. I had no faith in or loyalty to God, nor did I have any love for my brothers and sisters. Although my flesh lived, I didn’t practice the truth and had no genuine testimony, so I didn’t meet with God’s approval at all. If I didn’t pursue the truth, repent, and change, I would certainly be eliminated.

Later, I read two passages from God’s words and found a path of practice. Almighty God says: “To bear testimony to God and to shame the great red dragon, one must have a principle, and one must meet a condition: One must love God in their heart and enter into His words. If you do not enter into the words of God, then you will have no way of shaming Satan. Through growth in your life, you rebel against the great red dragon and bring utter humiliation upon it; only this is truly to shame the great red dragon” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Only Those Who Know the Work of God Today May Serve God). “If people choose to practice the truth, then even though they have lost their interests, they are gaining God’s salvation and eternal life. Those people are the smartest ones. If people give up the truth for the sake of their interests, then they lose the life and God’s salvation; those people are the most foolish ones. What a person chooses—their interests or the truth—is incredibly revealing. Those who love the truth will choose the truth; they will choose to submit to God and to follow Him. They would rather abandon their own interests to pursue the truth. No matter how much they have to suffer, they are determined to stand firm in their testimony to satisfy God. This is the fundamental path for practicing the truth and entering the truth reality” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Knowing One’s Disposition Is the Foundation of Changing It). From God’s words, I understood that when faced with dire circumstances, I must rebel against my flesh and put aside my personal interests. Even if this means risking or suffering losses to my personal interests, I must still uphold the church’s work and protect the safety of my brothers and sisters. Shortly after Liu Ming left, several brothers and sisters often came to my house due to the needs of their duties. One of the brothers had even been arrested before. I thought to myself, “The police are often out in their cars patrolling the streets; the police already have this brother on file, and there are lots of surveillance cameras on the way to my house. If the police are watching, I’ll surely be arrested sooner or later!” I felt a bit timid again, and I thought about telling the brothers and sisters not to come to my house so often. But then I thought about how their coming here was for the needs of their duties, and that if I said this, it would definitely constrain them. I recalled my previous experience of hosting two sisters, and I knew that this time, I couldn’t just consider my own interests. I had faith that everything was in God’s hands, and I should prioritize upholding the church’s work. So I prayed to God, entrusting everything to Him, and I no longer felt as constrained.

Reflecting on my experiences during this time, I saw that my nature was truly selfish, and that my faith in God was too weak. Although I’d believed in God for many years, I didn’t have a true understanding of God’s almightiness and sovereignty, nor any truth realities at all. This experience of hosting brothers and sisters revealed me and was also God’s salvation for me, showing me my corruption and shortcomings and prompting me to pursue the truth. I thank God from the bottom of my heart!