By Chengqian, China

In October 2022, Zhang Qiang and I received a letter from the leader asking us to cooperate to supervise video work. We were both quite happy to receive the letter. That night, Zhang Qiang went to sleep first, and I noticed that our reply to the leader seemed a bit simple, so I added some of my own thoughts at the end. After a while, Zhang Qiang woke up, and I told him that I’d made some additions. Unexpectedly, Zhang Qiang, with a lecturing tone, said I was acting dictatorially, and told me to reflect on my intentions. I was quite surprised, thinking, “I just added some of my own thoughts and I didn’t change the original content, how was I acting dictatorially? How can you lecture me without understanding the situation?” I defended myself with a few words. After speaking, I started to think, “We’ve only just started cooperating; if our relationship becomes strained now, how will we get along later?” To avoid further conflict, I accepted his feedback and started reflecting on myself. The next day, when we opened up in fellowship, Zhang Qiang asked me to point out his issues. Since he asked, I pointed out that he often spoke down his nose and that he lectured others. Zhang Qiang’s face quickly dropped, and he said he didn’t have that issue. Seeing his rigid attitude and unwillingness to accept what I’d said, I was afraid that if I continued, our relationship would become strained, so I said, “Maybe I’m not seeing this clearly; if you think you don’t have that issue, then maybe I’m wrong.” After saying that, I changed the topic, and seeing his expression soften, I felt relieved.

After that, I started to tread more carefully around Zhang Qiang. To avoid conflict with Zhang Qiang, I usually waited for him to share his views first during work discussions, and if his opinion was similar to mine, I would go with his. But if our views differed, I would try to bring it up as tactfully as I could and let him decide. If he couldn’t judge which was correct, we would ask the leader. One time, some brothers and sisters wrote asking about the principles for making videos. I noticed that Zhang Qiang’s reply wasn’t quite appropriate in one part, as it was a bit rigid. I knew his response would very likely mislead others, but I felt if I brought it up directly, Zhang Qiang most likely wouldn’t want to hear it, so I didn’t want to mention it. But then I thought about how God requires us to be honest and uphold the church’s work, so I pointed out the issue to Zhang Qiang. However, Zhang Qiang didn’t accept what I was saying and found excuses to say he was right. Although he eventually realized that what he had written was inappropriate and agreed to let me edit it, I felt drained after the disagreement. I thought to myself, “It would’ve been better not to say anything. Bringing these kinds of things up only leads to arguments and makes things awkward going forward. If I don’t mention it, we all get along, and I feel more at ease. Sooner or later, his disposition will make him hit a wall and fail. I’ll let God arrange a situation to prune him later. I’m not going to stick my neck out to offend him.” A while later, since the videos made by the brothers and sisters frequently had deviations, I suggested that we analyze the issues and study the principles together. Zhang Qiang was unhappy and said, “These principles have already been made clear enough. Anyone can understand them at a glance. Why do we need to study them?” I thought to myself, “The previous mistakes were due to our cavalier attitude toward the principles. We thought we understood the principles, but we didn’t actually grasp them. If we still don’t study them properly now, isn’t it just the same as before? That won’t do. If we don’t study these principles, we’ll keep making problems of principle.” So I wanted to bring this up to Zhang Qiang, but when the words were on my lips, I hesitated, thinking, “Zhang Qiang’s position is clear, he doesn’t want to study. If I don’t bring it up again, at the very least we can keep things peaceful. If I fellowship with him about it, we’re just going to argue again.” Thinking about how uncomfortable I felt for days after each argument, I didn’t dare bring it up again. After that, I gradually gave up studying principles. Because the brothers and sisters didn’t properly enter into the principles, the deviations in the videos’ production continued with little improvement.

Not long after, the leader asked me and other brothers and sisters to write evaluations of Zhang Qiang. When he saw that Zhang Qiang constantly couldn’t cooperate with others and that this affected his duties, the leader dismissed him. I was quite happy, because I finally wouldn’t have to cooperate with Zhang Qiang anymore. But the next day, the leader sent a letter saying that because our videos had gone so long without producing results, our team was being dissolved. Hearing this, I was stunned, thinking, “I hadn’t even given my all in this duty, and now it’s all over?” For the past few months, I’d been cooperating with Zhang Qiang without principles, playing the role of a people pleaser, avoiding conflict to the point where I rarely even expressed my opinions, let alone put my heart and soul into getting the work done well. Now, I was no longer needed for this duty, and I had no chance to make up for my transgressions. After returning home, I reflected on myself. I read a passage of God’s words: “Most people wish to pursue and practice the truth, but much of the time they merely have a resolution and the desire to do so; the truth has not become their life. As a result, when they come across evil forces or encounter evil people and bad people committing evil deeds, or false leaders and antichrists doing things in a way that violates principles—thus disturbing the work of the church and harming God’s chosen ones—they lose the courage to stand up and speak out. What does it mean when you have no courage? Does it mean that you are timid or inarticulate? Or is it that you do not understand thoroughly, and therefore do not have the confidence to speak up? Neither; this is primarily the consequence of being constrained by corrupt dispositions. One of the corrupt dispositions you reveal is a deceitful disposition; when something happens to you, the first thing you think of is your own interests, the first thing you consider is the consequences, whether this will be beneficial to you. This is a deceitful disposition, is it not? Another is a selfish and base disposition. You think, ‘What does a loss to the interests of God’s house have to do with me? I’m not a leader, so why should I care? It’s got nothing to do with me. It’s not my responsibility.’ Such thoughts and words are not something that you consciously think, but are produced by your subconscious—which is the corrupt disposition revealed when people encounter an issue. Corrupt dispositions such as this govern the way you think, they bind your hands and feet, and control what you say. In your heart, you want to stand up and speak, but you have misgivings, and even when you do speak out, you beat around the bush, and leave yourself wiggle room, or else you prevaricate and don’t tell the truth. People who are clear-eyed can see this; in truth, you know in your heart that you have not said all you should, that what you have said has had no effect, that you were merely going through the motions, and that the problem has not been solved. You have not fulfilled your responsibility, yet you say overtly that you have fulfilled your responsibility, or that what was happening was unclear to you. Is this true? And is it what you really think? Are you not then completely under the control of your satanic disposition? Even though some of what you say is in line with the facts, in key places and on crucial issues, you lie and deceive people, which proves that you are someone who lies, and who lives by their satanic disposition. Everything you say and think has been processed by your brain, leading to your every utterance being fake, empty, a lie; actually, everything you say is contrary to the facts, for the sake of justifying yourself, for your own benefit, and you feel you have achieved your aims when you have misled people and made them believe. Such is the way you speak; it also represents your disposition. You are wholly controlled by your own satanic disposition. You have no power over what you say and do. Even if you wanted to, you could not tell the truth or say what you really think; even if you wanted to, you could not practice the truth; even if you wanted to, you could not fulfill your responsibilities. Everything you say, do, and practice is a lie, and you’re just perfunctory. You are wholly shackled and controlled by your satanic disposition. You may want to accept and practice the truth, but it’s not up to you. When your satanic dispositions control you, you say and do whatever your satanic disposition tells you to do. You are nothing but a puppet of corrupt flesh, you have become a tool of Satan. Afterward, you feel regret at having once again followed the corrupt flesh and how you could have failed to practice the truth. You think to yourself, ‘I can’t overcome the flesh on my own and must pray to God. I didn’t stand up to stop those who were disturbing the work of the church, and my conscience is weighing on me. I’ve made up my mind that, when this happens again, I must stand up to and prune those who are committing misdeeds in the performance of their duties and disturbing the work of the church, so that they behave themselves and stop acting recklessly.’ After finally mustering the courage to speak up, you get scared and back down as soon as the other person gets angry and bangs on the table. Are you able to be in charge? What use are determination and will? They’re both useless. … You never seek the truth, let alone practice it. You are merely constantly praying, making resolutions, setting aspirations, and pledging in your heart. And what is the outcome? You remain a people pleaser, you are not forthcoming about the problems you encounter, you do not care about evil people when you see them, you do not respond when someone does evil or creates a disturbance, and you remain aloof when you are not affected personally. You think, ‘I don’t talk about anything that doesn’t concern me. As long as it doesn’t hurt my interests, my vanity, or my image, I disregard everything without exception. I have to be very careful, as the bird that sticks its neck out is the one that gets shot. I’m not going to do anything stupid!’ You are totally and unwaveringly controlled by your corrupt dispositions of wickedness, deceitfulness, hardness, and aversion to the truth. They have grown harder for you to bear than the tightening golden headband worn by the Monkey King. Living under the control of corrupt dispositions is so exhausting and excruciating!” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Part Three). After reading God’s words, I realized that my lack of courage to point out Zhang Qiang’s issues wasn’t due to Zhang Qiang’s domineering or arrogant disposition, but because I was unwaveringly controlled by my deceitful and selfish nature. Almost every time before speaking, I would first consider if I might offend Zhang Qiang, and if there was something he wouldn’t like, even if it was beneficial to the work, I wouldn’t say it. Thinking back to when I first started working with Zhang Qiang, I’d immediately established a principle for myself when I saw that he was difficult to get along with: Avoid conflicts, don’t touch on his issues, and maintain a good relationship. When I saw that one part of Zhang Qiang’s reply was inappropriate, I pointed out the issue, which led to an argument, making our interactions awkward, and I became even more convinced that the philosophy for worldly dealings of “Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance” was correct. I felt that I should avoid saying anything that might offend Zhang Qiang. Later, when I saw Zhang Qiang’s cavalier attitude toward studying professions and principles, I clearly knew this would hinder the work, but to avoid conflict, I chose to back down. As a result, because the brothers and sisters didn’t enter into principles in making videos, much of the work was for nothing. I interacted with people based on a deceitful and selfish disposition, doing my best to avoid running up against or offending anyone, and although I protected my relationships, I wasn’t fulfilling my responsibilities at all. I didn’t remind others when I should have, nor did I uphold the principles. This all harmed the work. I appeared to be a good person, but in reality, these “good” behaviors stemmed from my deceitful and selfish corrupt disposition. They were all about protecting my own interests, which God loathes.

Later, I read God’s words dissecting the satanic poison of “Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance,” which targeted my problem exactly. Almighty God says: “Family conditions and influences you in other ways, for instance with the saying ‘Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance.’ Family members often teach you: ‘Be kind and don’t argue with others or make enemies, because if you make too many enemies, you won’t be able to gain a foothold in society, and if there are too many people who hate you and are out to get you, then you won’t be safe in society. You will always be under threat, and your survival, status, family, personal safety, and even your career promotion prospects will be jeopardized and impeded by nasty people. So you must learn that “Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance.” Be kind to everyone, don’t damage good relationships, don’t say anything that you can’t take back later, avoid hurting people’s pride, and don’t expose their shortcomings. Avoid or stop saying things that people don’t want to listen to. Just give compliments, because it never hurts to compliment somebody. You must learn to show forbearance and compromise in both big and small matters, because “Compromise will make a conflict much easier to resolve.”’ Think about it, your family instills two ideas and views into you at once. In one sense, they say that you need to be kind to others; in another sense, they need you to be forbearing, not speak out of turn, and if you have something to say, you should button your lip until you get home and then tell your family. Or better still, don’t even tell your family at all, because walls have ears—if ever the secret leaks out, things will not go well for you. To gain a foothold and survive in this society, people must learn one thing, which is to be a fence-straddler. In colloquial terms, you must be slippery and cunning. You can’t just say what’s on your mind. If you go ahead and say what’s on your mind, that’s called being stupid, it’s not called being smart. … This kind of person is always liked by some people in the church, because they never make big mistakes, they never give themselves away, and the evaluation from church leaders and brothers and sisters is that they get on just fine with everyone. They are lukewarm about their duty, they do just what is asked of them. They are especially obedient and well-behaved, they never hurt others in conversation or when dealing with matters, and they never take unfair advantage of anyone. They never speak ill of others, and they never judge people behind their backs. However, no one knows whether they are sincere in performing their duty, and no one knows what they think of others or what opinion they hold about them. After careful thought, you even feel that this kind of person really is a bit weird and difficult to fathom, and that keeping them on might lead to trouble. What should you do? It’s a tough call, isn’t it? … They don’t hold grudges against anyone. If someone says something to hurt them, or reveals a corrupt disposition that infringes on their dignity, what do they think? ‘I will show forbearance, I won’t hold it against you, but a day will come when you’ll make a fool of yourself!’ When that person really is dealt with or makes a fool of themselves, they secretly laugh about it. They readily make fun of other people, leaders, and God’s house, but they don’t make fun of themselves. They just don’t know what problems or flaws they have themselves. People like this are careful not to reveal anything that can hurt others, or anything that enables others to see through them, although they think about these things in their heart. Whereas, when it comes to things that can benumb or mislead others, they freely express them and let people see them. People like this are the most insidious and difficult to deal with. So what attitude does God’s house take toward people like this? Use them if they can be used, and clear them out if they can’t—this is the principle. Why is that? The reason is that people like this are destined not to pursue the truth. They are disbelievers who make fun of God’s house, brothers and sisters, and leaders when things go wrong. What role do they play? Is it the role of Satan and devils? (Yes.) When they show patience toward their brothers and sisters, it constitutes neither genuine tolerance nor genuine love. They do it to protect themselves and to avoid attracting any enemies or danger their way. They don’t tolerate their brothers and sisters to protect them, nor do they do it out of love, and less still do they do it because they are pursuing the truth and practicing in accordance with the truth principles. Theirs is entirely an attitude that centers on drifting along and misleading others. Such people are fence-straddlers and slippery stones. They don’t like the truth and they don’t pursue it, instead they just drift along” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (12)). After reading God’s words, I felt deeply pained. For so long, I had been a people pleaser, mainly to avoid making enemies, and so that my life could be a bit more comfortable. I was following the philosophies for worldly dealings of “Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance,” and “Compromise will make a conflict much easier to resolve.” Thinking back, I’d been interacting with people like this since I was young. When faced with unfair situations, like classmates stealing my things or borrowing money without returning it, I would try to reason with them, but when I saw their tough attitude or resentment toward me, to avoid escalating conflict or causing trouble for myself, most of the time, I would choose tolerance. After finding God, I continued interacting with people this way. In cooperating with Zhang Qiang, whenever we had differing opinions or his words touched a nerve, to avoid conflict, I dealt with these issues by tolerating them, saying as little as possible and remaining silent whenever I could. My “tolerance” made it seem like I wasn’t being petty or argumentative, as if I was being forbearing toward others, but it was just human restraint and pretense for the sake of self-preservation. While tolerating, I wasn’t being truly forbearing at all, and I was full of biases and resentment toward others. For example, when I saw Zhang Qiang acting out of his corrupt disposition, disrupting the work, I didn’t think to expose, stop, remind, or help him, but instead, I just quietly waited for him to fail and hit a wall. So when Zhang Qiang was dismissed, I felt glad, even wishing he could leave sooner. I was also completely irresponsible in the video work, prioritizing my own comfort and avoiding conflicts, passively watching as the work was damaged without feeling any concern. I was so selfish and despicable, without any loyalty to God! My reassignment in my duty this time was God’s way of reminding and warning me. If I kept conducting myself and acting according to Satan’s philosophies for worldly dealings, I would only become more and more selfish and deceitful, and even more likely to hinder church work and resist God, and in the end, I’d be hated and eliminated by God.

Later on, I realized that I had never found the right principles for cooperating with others, so I searched for God’s words related to this matter. Almighty God says: “What is cooperation? You have to be able to discuss things with each other, and express your views and opinions; you must complement and supervise each other, and seek from each other, make inquiries of each other, and prompt each other. That’s what it is to cooperate in harmony. Say, for instance, you handled something according to your own will, and someone said, ‘You did it wrong, entirely against the principles. Why did you handle it however you wanted, without seeking the truth?’ To this, you say, ‘That’s right—I’m glad you alerted me! If you hadn’t, it would have spelled disaster!’ That’s what prompting each other is. What is it, then, to supervise each other? Everyone has a corrupt disposition, and may be perfunctory in doing their duty, safeguarding only their own status and pride, not the interests of God’s house. Such states are there in every person. If you learn that someone has a problem, you should take the initiative to fellowship with them, reminding them to do their duty according to the principles, while letting it stand as a warning to yourself. That’s mutual supervision. What function does mutual supervision serve? It’s meant to safeguard the interests of God’s house, and also to keep people from taking the wrong road” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Eight: They Would Have Others Submit Only to Them, Not the Truth or God (Part One)). After reading God’s words, I understood that true harmonious cooperation isn’t established through tolerance, but by practicing the truth, and it is built through mutual tolerance, help, reminders, and supervision among brothers and sisters. When we see small faults or shortcomings in brothers and sisters, we should be tolerant of their deficiencies. However, if we see them acting against principles, which would hinder or disturb church work, then we must promptly remind and stop them, and we shouldn’t simply put up with it. For example, when I saw that Zhang Qiang was unwilling to gather everyone together to study the principles, and remained stubborn even after I fellowshipped with him, I should have pointed out his problem at that time. Although this might have led to some conflict at the time, if he was a person who pursued the truth, it would have benefited both him and the church’s work. Even if he didn’t listen, I shouldn’t have given up easily. Instead, I should have persisted, by continuing to remind, prune, warn, or even report and expose him if necessary, in order to uphold the principles and safeguard the church’s work. Only in this way would I be fulfilling my responsibility as a partner. I failed before because I relied on tolerance to maintain superficial harmony, without fulfilling my responsibility to remind or supervise my counterpart, or report problems. This led to a lack of genuine heart-to-heart communication or mutual help for a long time, and as a result, there was no true harmony in our cooperation. If I had brought up the problems I’d seen in the course of our cooperation for discussion and consultation, and done what would have been beneficial to both the brothers and sisters and the church’s work, the video work wouldn’t have suffered such great losses, and I would have fulfilled my responsibilities.

Later on, I was chosen to be a church leader. I noticed that my co-workers and I were living in a state of shutting ourselves away to work without focusing on life entry, and that we rarely communicated about work. I also found that the preacher wasn’t assisting us with church work, and was being very passive in her duty. I wanted to bring up these issues, but when the words reached my lips, I hesitated, and I thought to myself, “People generally don’t like to hear these kinds of things. If I say this, will it cause disharmony between us?” But then I realized that I was just trying to protect myself again, so I prayed to God to adjust my state. Then I read some of God’s words: “When faced with cardinal issues of right and wrong, and in matters that have a bearing on the interests of God’s house, if such people can make some appropriate choices and let go of the philosophies for worldly dealings that they harbor in their hearts, such as ‘Harmony is a treasure; forbearance is brilliance,’ in order to uphold the interests of God’s house, reduce their transgressions, and lessen their evil deeds before God—how will this benefit them? At the very least, when in the future God determines each person’s outcome, it will alleviate their punishment and lessen God’s chastening of them. By practicing this way, such people have nothing to lose and everything to gain, do they not?” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (12)). From God’s words, I found a path of practice. I shouldn’t live relying on the philosophies of Satan when facing situations, and instead should uphold the interests of God’s house first and minimize my transgressions. Realizing this, I pointed out the issues the preacher had in her duty. The sister didn’t resist, and instead, she opened up and talked about her state with us. I also brought up the issues of cooperation among us co-workers and offered some suggestions. The partnered sisters reflected on and knew themselves, and afterward, things changed for the better. I realized that only by practicing according to God’s words can there be true harmony in cooperation, and this can bring a deep sense of peace and stability to our hearts.