By Su Ran, China

When I was in school, our teachers often taught us that showing filial piety to our parents and respecting our elders was a traditional Chinese virtue. My parents often taught me this as well, and they practiced it themselves. Whenever there was a job to do at my grandmother’s house, my father would put aside his own chores to help her, and on weekends, he would take us to help with farm work at her place. At that time, my parents were often out working in the fields, and my siblings and I were very young with no one to look after us, and my grandmother didn’t take care of us. But my mother didn’t begrudge my grandmother; instead, she took care of her. She cooked my grandmother’s favorite foods and took her to the doctor when she was sick. Relatives, friends, and neighbors all praised my parents for their filial piety and good humanity. Seeing this, I thought to myself, “I want to be like my parents in the future, honoring my parents and being filial to my in-laws. This is what a person with good humanity should do.”

In 2013, I accepted Almighty God’s work. My husband, influenced by the CCP’s baseless rumors, opposed my faith and divorced me in 2014. After the divorce, I moved back in with my parents, doing my duties while also taking care of my parents and helping with housework. In 2017, I went to another place to do my duties. Shortly after, I received a letter from home, saying that the police had gone to my home to warn and threaten my parents not to believe in God anymore. They also demanded a photo of me and interrogated them about my whereabouts. After that, I didn’t dare go home. When I thought of my parents, who were almost sixty and in poor health, especially my mother, who had been left with lingering issues after a serious leg fracture a few years ago, and who had trouble working when her leg pain flared up, I always wondered when I could go home to see them.

In August 2019, I risked returning home. The moment I saw my parents, I noticed that their faces had a lot more wrinkles, and that their hair was turning white at the temples. My mother had also gotten much thinner, and I felt bitterness and discomfort in my heart. It hadn’t been easy for our parents to raise us, and now, at their age, and in poor health, they still had to work so hard out in the fields. As their daughter, I couldn’t be there to take care of them and I couldn’t help them with the work, so I felt unfilial and a bit guilty. My aunt also criticized me, saying, “You’ve been away for several years without coming back. Your parents are getting older, and if they get sick or have an accident, there’s nobody around to take care of them. A few days ago, your dad was out spraying the crops, and he got poisoned in the heat. If he hadn’t gotten to the hospital in time, he might have died.” Hearing this made me feel very upset, and I remembered the saying: “Do not travel far while your parents yet live.” But I couldn’t be with them to take care of them or do anything for them. I felt like my parents had wasted their time in raising me. In the past, I had been seen by relatives as a sensible and filial child, but now I’d become an unfilial child, a thankless wretch. The night before I was to leave, my father said that I was his greatest concern. He said that because I had no home or career now, he was working hard to scrape together some more money for me. He also said he was constantly worried about me getting arrested, that he often lay awake all night, and that he spent his days constantly on edge. Whenever he received a call from the village committee, he worried whether it would be about me being arrested by the police. My father said all this with tears in his eyes. My heart felt as if it had been struck by a hammer, and I couldn’t hold back my tears. I felt that at their age, with me not only not taking care of them, but also making them worry about me, I was truly unfilial! After returning to my host family, I kept thinking back on my father’s words and his haggard face, and I felt deep pain in my heart. If I wasn’t away doing my duty, wouldn’t I be able to show filial piety toward my parents? Thinking this, I didn’t want to do my duty away from home anymore. I really wanted to go home and take care of my parents, so they wouldn’t have to worry or suffer for me anymore. But the police were still after me, and going back would mean I’d likely be arrested. Besides, I was really busy with my duties, and if I abandoned them, wouldn’t I be betraying God? During those days, I was deeply conflicted and felt great pain and torment. Living in such a state, I couldn’t focus on my duties, which resulted in them being delayed. Knowing my state wasn’t right, I prayed to God, asking Him to guide me out of this wrong state.

During my devotionals, I read a passage of God’s words: “Is showing filial piety toward one’s parents the truth? (No, it’s not.) Being filial to one’s parents is a correct and positive thing, but why do we say that it is not the truth? (Because people do not show filial piety to their parents with principles and they are not able to discern what kind of people their parents truly are.) How a person should treat their parents relates to the truth. If your parents believe in God and treat you well, should you be filial to them? (Yes.) How are you filial? You treat them differently from brothers and sisters. You do everything they say, and if they are old, you must stay by their side to care for them, which stops you from going out to perform your duty. Is it right to do this? (No.) What should you do at such times? This depends on the circumstances. If you are still able to look after them whilst performing your duty near your home, and your parents do not object to your faith in God, then you should fulfill your responsibility as a son or daughter and help your parents with some work. If they are ill, look after them; if something is troubling them, comfort them; if your financial circumstances allow, buy them the nutritional supplements that suit your budget. However, what should you choose to do if you are busy with your duty, there is no one to look after your parents, and they, too, believe in God? What truth should you practice? Since being filial to one’s parents is not the truth, but only a human responsibility and obligation, what then should you do if your obligation conflicts with your duty? (Prioritize my duty; put duty first.) An obligation is not necessarily one’s duty. Choosing to perform one’s duty is practicing the truth, whereas fulfilling an obligation is not. If you have this condition, you may fulfill this responsibility or obligation, but if the current environment does not allow it, what should you do? You should say, ‘I must do my duty—that is practicing the truth. Being filial to my parents is living by my conscience and it falls short of the practice of the truth.’ So, you should prioritize your duty and uphold it. If you have no duty now, and don’t work far from home, and live close to your parents, then find ways to take care of them. Do your best to help them live a little better and lessen their suffering. But this also depends on what kind of people your parents are. What should you do if your parents are of poor humanity, if they constantly hinder you from believing in God, and if they keep dragging you away from believing in God and performing your duty? What is the truth that you should practice? (Rejection.) At this time, you must reject them. You have fulfilled your obligation. Your parents don’t believe in God, so you have no obligation to show filial respect to them. If they believe in God, then they are family, your parents. If they do not, then you are walking different paths: They believe in Satan and worship the devil king, and they walk the path of Satan; they are people who are walking different paths to those who believe in God. You are no longer a family. They regard believers in God as their adversaries and enemies, so you have no more obligation to take care of them and must cut them off completely. Which is the truth: being filial to one’s parents or performing one’s duty? Of course, performing one’s duty is the truth. Performing one’s duty in God’s house is not simply about fulfilling one’s obligation and doing what one is supposed to do. It is about performing the duty of a created being. Herein is God’s commission; it is your obligation, your responsibility. This is a true responsibility, which is to fulfill your responsibility and obligation before the Creator. This is the Creator’s requirement of people, and it is the great matter of life. But showing filial respect to one’s parents is merely the responsibility and obligation of a son or daughter. It is certainly not commissioned by God, and less still does it accord with God’s requirement. Therefore, between showing filial respect to one’s parents and performing one’s duty, there is no doubt that performing one’s duty, and that alone, is practicing the truth. Performing one’s duty as a created being is the truth, and it is a bounden duty. Showing filial respect to one’s parents is about being filial to people. It does not mean that one is performing their duty, nor does it mean that they are practicing the truth” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. What Is the Truth Reality?). After reading God’s words, I felt some relief, and I understood that being filial to one’s parents is a positive thing and part of normal humanity, but it is not practicing the truth. Doing the duty of a created being is practicing the truth. My parents had always supported me in my faith and duties, and showing filial piety toward them is my responsibility as their child. Under suitable circumstances and conditions, I can do my best to take care of them, to alleviate their worries and difficulties, and to fulfill my responsibilities as their child. But as I was being hunted by the police and couldn’t take care of them at home, and with my duties being busy, at this time, I had to prioritize my duties. Through God’s words, I also understood that as a created being, fulfilling the duty of a created being is my mission, the most important thing in life, and a bounden duty that must be completed. Being filial to one’s parents is merely fulfilling the responsibility of a child, and it doesn’t mean one practices the truth, nor does it mean one submits to God. When being filial to parents conflicts with the performance of duties, I had to choose to do the duty of a created being. Realizing these things, I no longer felt conflicted or pained. I was willing to submit to God’s sovereignty and arrangements and settle down to do my duties.

Later, I read another passage of God’s words and gained some understanding of my state. Almighty God says: “Due to the conditioning of Chinese traditional culture, in Chinese people’s traditional notions they believe that one must observe filial piety toward their parents. Whoever does not observe filial piety is an unfilial child. These ideas have been instilled in people since childhood, and they are taught in practically every household, as well as in every school and in society at large. When a person’s head has been filled with such stuff, they think, ‘Filial piety is more important than anything. If I weren’t to observe it, I wouldn’t be a good person—I’d be an unfilial child and I’d be denounced by society. I’d be a person who lacks conscience.’ Is this view correct? People have seen so many truths expressed by God—has God demanded that one show filial piety toward their parents? Is this one of the truths that believers in God must understand? No, it is not. God has only fellowshipped on some principles. By what principle do God’s words ask that people treat others? Love what God loves, and hate what God hates: This is the principle that should be adhered to. God loves those who pursue the truth and are able to follow His will; these are also the people that we should love. Those who are not able to follow God’s will, who hate and rebel against God—these people are detested by God, and we should detest them, too. This is what God asks of man. … Satan uses this kind of traditional culture and notions of morality to bind your thoughts, your mind, and your heart, leaving you unable to accept God’s words; you have been possessed by these things of Satan, and rendered incapable of accepting God’s words. When you want to practice God’s words, these things cause disturbance within you, cause you to oppose the truth and God’s requirements, and make you powerless to rid yourself of the yoke of traditional culture. After struggling for a while, you compromise: You prefer to believe traditional notions of morality are correct and in line with the truth, and so you reject or forsake God’s words. You do not accept God’s words as the truth and you think nothing of being saved, feeling that you still live in this world, and can only survive by relying on these people. Unable to endure society’s recrimination, you would rather choose to give up the truth and God’s words, abandoning yourself to traditional notions of morality and the influence of Satan, preferring to offend God and not practice the truth. Tell Me, is man not pitiful? Do they not have need of God’s salvation? Some people have believed in God for many years, but still have no insight into the matter of filial piety. They really do not understand the truth. They can never break through this barrier of worldly relationships; they do not have the courage, nor the confidence, let alone the determination, so they cannot love and obey God” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only by Recognizing One’s Own Misguided Views Can One Truly Transform). Reflecting on God’s words, I realized that my suffering was rooted in traditional culture. Since childhood, our teachers had taught us to be filial to our parents, and that this is a traditional virtue of the Chinese people, and my parents also instilled this idea in me—that as I grew up, I should show filial piety toward my elders and parents, and they set an example by doing so themselves, causing this idea to become deeply rooted in my young heart. I came to believe that only by being filial to one’s parents can one be considered a filial child and a good person, and that if a person fails to do so, they are unfilial and a thankless wretch, and that they will be despised, condemned, and unworthy of being called a human. When I left home to do my duties and couldn’t take care of my parents, I felt like an unfilial daughter, and in particular, when I heard my parents were worried about me being captured, I felt even more unfilial. Not only was I unable to take care of them, but I was also causing them to worry about me, which made me feel indebted to them. Traditional ideas like “Filial piety is a virtue to be held above all else,” “Raise children to support you in old age,” and “Do not travel far while your parents yet live” bound and constrained me. I constantly felt guilty for not being able to be by my parents’ side to take care of them, and I even regretted leaving home to do my duties. Although I didn’t go back home, my heart had already strayed from God. I was being perfunctory in my duties and lacking loyalty. At this point, I finally saw that the traditional ideas instilled by Satan had caused me to distance myself from God and betray Him, causing me to unknowingly stand in opposition to God. I thought of Peter in the Age of Grace, who forsook his family and parents to follow the Lord Jesus, preaching the gospel far and wide, and shepherding the church. I also thought of the Western missionaries who considered the Lord’s intentions, and who forsook their families, parents, and children to bring more people to accept the Lord’s salvation. They traveled thousands of miles to China to propagate the Lord’s gospel and completed their mission. These were individuals with humanity and conscience. Now, as disasters are becoming more severe, it is the time for the great expansion of the kingdom gospel, and more people are needed to rise up to preach the gospel and bear witness to God. I have eaten and drunk so many of God’s words and understood some truths, and as a created being, I should consider God’s intentions and preach the gospel to bring more people before Him to accept His salvation. This is what it means to be a person with humanity. Realizing these things, I was able to set my heart at ease in my duties.

Later, I received another letter from home, which said that in August 2022, the police had come to my home to arrest me. My father told them I wasn’t at home, but they didn’t believe him, so they secretly installed a bug in my family’s storage room. One afternoon, four people from the police station arrived. They came to my home with guns to arrest me and drove my parents out of the house, searching inside for more than ten minutes. The police then called my relatives to ask where I was. This letter really upset me and I couldn’t help but break down in tears. I thought about how my parents had worried about me getting arrested while I did my duties away from home all these years, and about how the police had even planted a bug in my home to catch me, and that my parents’ final years would be spent under police surveillance. It was all because of me that my parents had to suffer these troubles. I was really troubled and couldn’t calm my heart, even while doing my duties. Later, I realized my state wasn’t right, so I consciously prayed and sought. I recalled some of God’s words I had read before and quickly looked them up to read. Almighty God says: “Some people abandon their families because they believe in God and perform their duties. They become famous because of this and the government frequently searches their house, harasses their parents, and even threatens their parents to hand them over. All their neighbors talk about them, saying, ‘This person has no conscience. They don’t care for their elderly parents. Not only are they unfilial, but they also cause so much trouble for their parents. They are an unfilial child!’ Are any of these words in line with the truth? (No.) But aren’t all these words considered right in the eyes of the nonbelievers? Among nonbelievers, they think this is the most legitimate and reasonable way of looking at it, and that it is in line with human ethics, and in accordance with the standards of human conduct. No matter how much content is included in these standards, such as how to show filial respect to parents, how to take care of them in their old age and arrange their funerals, or how much to repay them, and regardless of whether these standards accord with the truth or not, in the eyes of nonbelievers, they are positive things, they are positive energy, they are right, and they are considered irreproachable within all groups of people. Among nonbelievers, these are the standards for people to live by, and you have to do these things to be an adequately good person in their hearts. Before you believed in God and understood the truth, didn’t you also firmly believe that such conduct was being a good person? (Yes.) Moreover, you also used these things to evaluate yourself and restrain yourself, and you required yourself to be this kind of person. If you wanted to be a good person, you must have surely included these things in your standards of conduct: how to be filial to your parents, how to make them feel less worried, how to bring them honor and credit, and how to bring glory to your ancestors. These were the standards of conduct in your heart and the direction of your conduct. However, after you listened to God’s words and His sermons, your viewpoint began to change, and you understood that you have to forsake everything to perform your duty as a created being, and that God requires people to conduct themselves this way. Before you were certain that performing your duty as a created being was the truth, you thought you should be filial to your parents, but you also felt you should perform your duty as a created being, and you felt conflicted inside. Through the continuous watering and shepherding of God’s words, you gradually came to understand the truth, and it was then that you realized that performing your duty as a created being is perfectly natural and justified. Up until this day, many people have been able to accept the truth and completely abandon the standards of conduct from man’s traditional notions and imaginings. When you completely let go of these things, you are no longer constrained by words of judgment and condemnation from nonbelievers when you follow God and perform your duty as a created being, and you could cast them off easily” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. What Is the Truth Reality?). The enlightenment and guidance of God’s words made me realize that I was living according to the traditional cultural values instilled by Satan again. I thought about how I hadn’t been able to care for my parents all these years, and how because of me, the police had gone to my home to arrest me, and that my parents were not only having to endure ridicule from the neighbors, but would also have to endure long-term harassment from the police, alongside worrying about my safety. So I felt that all the suffering my parents were having to go through was because of me, and that if it weren’t for me, my parents wouldn’t have to suffer these hardships. This made me feel like an unfilial child. My perspective had been the same as that of nonbelievers and didn’t align with the truth. My belief in God only involved eating and drinking His words and pursuing the truth, and I hadn’t committed a crime, yet the CCP police had come to my home en masse with guns to arrest me, threatening my parents, and demanding to know my whereabouts. The real culprit causing my parents all this suffering was clearly the great red dragon, but instead of hating the great red dragon, I mistakenly believed that my faith had implicated my parents. Wasn’t I not distinguishing right from wrong? I couldn’t blame myself for all the suffering my parents were enduring, nor should I have been living in a constant state of feeling indebted to them. At this time, I had to focus on my duties, stand firm in my testimony, and shame Satan.

Later, I read more of God’s words: “If you truly believe that everything is in God’s hands, then you should believe that the issue of how much hardship your parents suffer and how much happiness they enjoy throughout their lives is also in God’s hands. Whether or not you are filial will not change anything—your parents will not suffer less because you are filial, and they will not suffer more because you are not filial. God preordained their fate long ago, and none of this will change because of your attitude toward them or the depth of feeling between you. They have their own fate. Regardless of whether they are poor or rich their entire lives, whether or not things go smoothly for them, or what kind of quality of life, material benefits, social status, and living conditions they enjoy, none of this has much to do with you. If you feel guilty toward them, if you feel you owe them something, and that you should be by their side, what would change even if you were by their side? (Nothing would change.) … most people choose to leave home to perform their duties in part because of the overarching objective circumstances, which necessitate them leaving their parents; they cannot stay by their parents’ side to take care of them and accompany them. It’s not that they willingly choose to leave their parents; this is the objective reason. For another thing, subjectively speaking, you go out to perform your duties not because you wanted to leave your parents and escape your responsibilities, but because of God’s calling. In order to cooperate with God’s work, accept His calling, and perform the duties of a created being, you had no choice but to leave your parents; you could not stay by their side to accompany them and take care of them. You didn’t leave them to avoid responsibilities, right? Leaving them to avoid your responsibilities and having to leave them to answer God’s calling and perform your duties—aren’t these of two different natures? (Yes.) In your heart, you do have emotional attachments and thoughts for your parents; your feelings are not empty. If objective circumstances allow, and you are able to stay by their side while also performing your duties, then you would be willing to stay by their side, regularly taking care of them and fulfilling your responsibilities. But because of objective circumstances, you must leave them; you cannot remain at their side. It’s not that you don’t want to fulfill your responsibilities as their child, but that you can’t. Isn’t this different in nature? (Yes.) If you left home to avoid being filial and fulfilling your responsibilities, that is unfilial and lacks humanity. Your parents raised you, but you can’t wait to spread your wings and quickly go off on your own. You don’t want to see your parents, and you don’t pay any regard when you hear about some difficulty they’ve encountered. Even if you have the means to help, you don’t; you just pretend not to hear and let others say whatever they want about you—you simply don’t want to fulfill your responsibilities. This is being unfilial. But is this the case now? (No.) Many people have left their counties, cities, provinces, or even their countries to perform their duties; they are already far away from their hometowns. Furthermore, it’s not convenient for them to stay in touch with their families for various reasons. Occasionally, they inquire about their parents’ current situation from people who came from the same hometown and feel relieved when they hear that their parents are still healthy and getting by okay. In fact, you are not unfilial; you haven’t reached the point of lacking humanity, where you don’t even want to care about your parents or fulfill your responsibilities toward them. It’s because of various objective reasons that you have to make this choice, so you’re not unfilial. These are the two reasons. And there’s one more, too: If your parents are not the type of people who particularly persecute you or obstruct your belief in God, if they support your belief in God, or if they are brothers and sisters who believe in God like you, members of God’s house themselves, then which of you doesn’t silently pray to God when thinking about your parents deep down? Which of you doesn’t entrust your parents—along with their health, safety, and all their life’s needs—to God’s hands? Entrusting your parents to God’s hands is the best way to show filial respect to them. You don’t hope they face all kinds of difficulties in their lives, and you don’t hope they live a bad life, eat poorly, or suffer poor health. Deep down in your heart, you certainly hope that God will protect them and keep them safe. If they are believers in God, you hope that they can perform their own duties and you also hope they can stand firm in their testimony. This is fulfilling one’s human responsibilities; people can only achieve this much with their own humanity. Moreover, what’s most important is that after years of believing in God and listening to so many truths, at the very least people have this little bit of understanding and comprehension: Man’s fate is determined by Heaven, man lives in the hands of God, and having God’s care and protection is far more important than the concerns, filial piety, or companionship of one’s children. Don’t you feel relieved that your parents are under God’s care and protection? You don’t need to worry about them. If you do worry, that means you do not trust God; your faith in Him is too small. If you are genuinely worried and concerned about your parents, then you should pray to God often, entrust them to God’s hands, and let God orchestrate and arrange everything. God rules over the fate of humankind and He rules over their every day and everything that happens to them, so what are you still worried about? You can’t even control your own life, you yourself have a ton of difficulties; what could you do to let your parents live happily every day? All you can do is entrust everything to God’s hands. If they are believers, ask God to lead them onto the right path so they can ultimately be saved. If they are not believers, let them walk whatever path they want. For parents that are kinder and have some humanity, you can pray to God to bless them so they can spend their remaining years in happiness. As for how God works, He has His arrangements, and people should submit to them” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (16)). After reading God’s words, I felt very brightened. I had always felt that not being able to be with my parents to care for them meant I lacked conscience and humanity, but I didn’t actually understand what it meant to be truly unfilial. For example, some people live with their parents or very close to them, and they have the opportunity to care for their parents, but for personal gain or physical indulgence, they neglect their responsibilities as children, and ignore their parents when they grow old or fall ill. Such people are truly unfilial and lack humanity. When I was home before, I was able to care for my parents while doing my duties, helping my parents with housework to the best of my ability. The reason I wasn’t caring for my parents now wasn’t because I’d lost my conscience or lacked humanity, nor because I was avoiding my responsibilities as a child, but rather, in part because I didn’t dare return since I was being hunted by the great red dragon, and also because as a created being, I should do my duties; this is my mission. I couldn’t abandon my duties to care for my parents. It wasn’t as if I had time at home but was choosing to not fulfill my responsibilities toward my parents. I had to view this matter according to God’s words and the truth. At the same time, I also understood that the amount of suffering and the types of hardships my parents are to go through, and whether they will be happy in their final years are all predestined by God, and have nothing to do with whether I care for them or am by their side. I cannot change anything at all. I thought back to when my mother had synovitis in her leg while I was at home. Even though I could help with some chores around the house and take care of her, her pain didn’t lessen at all because of my care. In the years since I left home, my mother’s leg gradually healed, and now she can do any kind of work. The facts prove that how well my parents live and what their final years will be like are all predestined by God. I had to entrust my parents to God’s hands and submit to His sovereignty and arrangements.

Later, I read more of God’s words: “What does God mean when He says that ‘God is the source of man’s life’? It is to make everyone realize this: Our lives and souls all come from God and were created by Him—not from our parents, and certainly not from nature, but given us by God. Only our flesh was born of our parents, as our children are born of us, but their fate is entirely in God’s hands. That we can believe in God is an opportunity given by Him; it is ordained by Him and is His grace. There is therefore no need for you to fulfill your obligation or responsibility to anyone else; you should only fulfill your duty to God as a created being. This is what people must do above anything else, the main thing that should be done as the primary affair of one’s life. If you do not fulfill your duty well, you are not a qualified created being. In the eyes of others, you may be a good wife and loving mother, an excellent housewife, a filial child, and an upstanding member of society, but before God you are one who rebels against Him, one who has not fulfilled their obligation or duty at all, one who accepted yet did not complete God’s commission, one who gave up halfway. Can someone like this gain God’s approval? People like this are worthless” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only by Recognizing One’s Own Misguided Views Can One Truly Transform). After reading God’s words, I understood that I am alive today because of God’s protection. God gave me life and has always provided for me and watched over me, all the way to this very day. The source of my life is God, not my parents. In reality, everything my parents have done for me is them fulfilling their responsibilities and obligations as parents. No matter what my parents have done, I should accept it from God. I should be most thankful to God, not my parents. Looking back on all these years, I saw I’d been living by traditional cultural ideas and values, treating filial piety and the fulfillment of a child’s responsibilities as my guiding principles of conduct, viewing these as more important than anything else. I even considered abandoning my duties to return home and care for my parents. Wasn’t I rebelling against God in this? No matter how well I took care of my parents, it wouldn’t be practicing the truth, nor would it mean I possessed conscience or humanity. Only by doing the duties of a created being does one truly have humanity. Although I still think about my parents and worry about them sometimes, from God’s words, I came to understand that the amount of suffering and types of experiences a person goes through in their lifetime are all in God’s hands. I am willing to entrust everything to do with my parents to God, to submit to His sovereignty and arrangements, and to do my duties well.