By Stacy, South Korea

In August 2022, I was supervising the watering work in the church. One day, a leader told me that some brothers and sisters had reported that I didn’t look into the newcomers’ states or difficulties before gatherings, and that the fellowship in the gatherings couldn’t resolve actual issues. They also reported that some newcomers hadn’t come to gatherings and that I hadn’t inquired about or looked into what was going on in good time. I didn’t say anything, but in my heart, I was arguing back, thinking, “I did ask about and look into some of the newcomers’ states in advance, but they just didn’t respond to my messages, so I wasn’t aware of what was going on with them. Also, even though at times I was unaware of some newcomers not coming to gatherings, they came back to attend gatherings regularly later on, so what’s the big deal?” I couldn’t help but feel somewhat dissatisfied with the brothers and sisters who’d reported the issues. I thought, “Before reporting these issues, you could have just talked to me and asked me about the situation and context first. If I didn’t accept them, then you could report to the leader. Now that you reported directly to the leader without saying anything, how would the leader view me? Wouldn’t she think that I didn’t accept suggestions or the truth?” These thoughts made me feel frustrated. Although I knew that suggestions from the brothers and sisters were helpful for my duties, and that I should first accept them, reflect on and know myself, and not argue back and try to justify myself, when I thought about how my pride and status would be damaged, I felt reluctant to face the situation.

Later, I calmed down and reflected on the issues reported by the brothers and sisters, and I realized that changes were indeed necessary. So, I sent a message in the group asking everyone to point out any of my issues they’d noticed. Before long, Brother Jayden pointed out some issues he’d seen and also provided me with some suggestions. When I saw that his comments were similar to what the leader had said, I became suspicious, thinking, “He must have been the one to report me to the leader. Why else would they be saying such similar things?” With this in mind, I found it hard to correctly treat the issues and suggestions put forward by him, and I rebutted each one point by point. He then sent a message in the group, “You said we could make suggestions and communicate about any problems, so now that we’ve done that, why are you just coming up with excuses and showing no willingness to seek or accept?” When he exposed me in front of so many brothers and sisters, I felt utterly humiliated. I began to form a bias against him, thinking, “You’re not letting me save face at all! You not only reported my problems to the leader in private, but also gave me suggestions and exposed me in front of all these people. How am I ever going to show my face again? How am I supposed to face the brothers and sisters after this? Couldn’t you have just told me in private if I had any problems? Why did you have to call me out in front of so many people? Are you going out of your way to embarrass and humiliate me in front of everyone? You’re clearly just trying to make life difficult for me. If I don’t show you who is boss, you think you can push me around.” I even had a malicious thought in my heart, “I’m responsible for the watering work. If you keep on like this without letting me save face, I’ll come up with a reason to stop you from watering the newcomers, because if I don’t, you’ll ruin everyone’s image of me.” When this thought crossed my mind, my heart skipped a beat, and I thought, “How could I have thought such a malicious thing? Wouldn’t this be attacking and retaliating against others?” I felt a little scared, so I quietly prayed to God, “God, please watch over my heart so that it may be calm and so that I don’t follow my corrupt disposition in my actions. Please guide me through this situation.” After I prayed, I saw several brothers and sisters sending messages in the group agreeing with Jayden’s suggestions. I finally realized that there was God’s intention in this situation coming upon me. I had to first accept and submit, seek the truth, reflect on myself, and learn a lesson.

One day during my devotionals, I read two passages of God’s words: “Regardless of the circumstances that cause someone to be pruned, what is the most crucial attitude to have toward it? First, you must accept it. No matter who is pruning you, for what reason, no matter whether it comes across as harsh, or what the tone and wording, you should accept it. Then, you should recognize what you have done wrong, what corrupt disposition you have revealed, and whether you acted in accordance with the truth principles. First and foremost, this is the attitude you should have. And are antichrists possessed of such an attitude? They are not; from start to finish, the attitude they exude is one of resistance and repulsion. With an attitude like that, can they be quiet before God and modestly accept pruning? No, they cannot. So, what will they do, then? First of all, they will vigorously argue and offer justifications, defending and arguing against the wrongs they have done and the corrupt disposition they have revealed, in hopes of winning people’s understanding and forgiveness, so that they need not take any responsibility or accept words that prune them. What is the attitude they evince when faced with being pruned? ‘I haven’t sinned. I’ve done nothing wrong. If I made a mistake, there was a reason for it; if I made a mistake, I didn’t do so on purpose, I shouldn’t have to take responsibility for it. Who doesn’t make a few mistakes?’ They seize on these statements and phrases, but they do not seek the truth, nor do they acknowledge the mistakes they have made or the corrupt dispositions they have revealed—and they certainly do not admit what their intent and goal were in doing evil. No matter how evident the mistakes they have made are or how great a loss they have caused, they turn a blind eye to these things. They do not feel the least bit sad or guilty, and their conscience does not feel reproached at all. Instead, they justify themselves with all their might and wage a war of words, thinking, ‘Everybody has a justifiable point of view. Everyone has their reasons; it comes down to who’s the better talker. If I can pass my justification and my explanation off on a majority, then I win, and the truths you speak of aren’t truths, and your facts aren’t valid. You want to condemn me? No way!’ When an antichrist is pruned, in the depths of their heart and soul, they are absolutely, resolutely resistant and repulsive, and reject it. Their attitude is, ‘Whatever you have to say, however right you may be, I won’t accept it, and I won’t admit to it. I’m not at fault.’ No matter how the facts bring their corrupt disposition to light, they do not acknowledge or accept it, but go on with their defiance and resistance. Whatever others say, they do not accept it or acknowledge it, but think, ‘Let’s see who can outtalk whom; let’s see who is a better speaker.’ This is one sort of attitude with which antichrists treat being pruned” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Eight)). “An antichrist’s attitude toward and various manifestations concerning pruning, as well as their thoughts, perspectives, ideas, and such that come out of this situation all differ from those of a regular person. When an antichrist is pruned, the first thing they do is resist and reject it deep in their heart. They fight it. And why is that? This is because antichrists, by their very nature essence, are averse to and hate the truth, and they do not accept the truth at all” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Twelve: They Want to Withdraw When They Have No Status or No Hope of Gaining Blessings). It was by thinking over God’s words that I finally realized that when a person who pursues the truth is pruned, no matter the attitude or tone of the person pruning them, or in what situation or context this pruning occurs, they can first accept it, reflect on where they have violated principles and what corrupt disposition they have revealed, and seek the truth to resolve it. However, antichrists are averse to and hate the truth in essence, and when they are pruned and given guidance by others, they feel the urge to resist and reject these things. Even if their problems are already apparent and have caused losses in work, they still don’t admit they’re at fault, and look for all sorts of reasons and excuses to defend and exonerate themselves. Reflecting on my attitude and behavior when I was pruned, I realized that the disposition I’d revealed was in fact the same as that of an antichrist. When brothers and sisters offered me suggestions, I didn’t quickly accept them, reflect on and review my problems and deviations, and instead, I felt resistant and displeased, and looked for all sorts of reasons and excuses to argue back and justify myself. In this, I was simply not accepting the truth and was instead averse to it! In fact, after careful consideration and reflection, I saw that the issues raised by my brothers and sisters were all factual, and that no matter the reasons, if the newcomers weren’t watered well, this meant I’d been irresponsible in my duty. Moreover, when the brothers and sisters reported that I’d not inquired about or looked into why the newcomers hadn’t come to gatherings in a timely manner, I’d even made excuses, thinking that the newcomers were just missing gatherings occasionally and would attend regularly again later on, and so this wasn’t a big issue. In reality, as a waterer, I didn’t know that the newcomers weren’t coming to gatherings and didn’t follow up with them or look into the matter in good time. That in itself was negligence and showed I was perfunctory. Yet I denied and refuted the issues and suggestions raised by brothers and sisters with various excuses, and while on the surface, this may not have seemed like a big problem, this concerned my attitude toward my duties, and revealed my attitude toward the truth and God as well. It was only when I reflected on this that I realized just how serious the nature of this issue was. If this situation hadn’t come upon me, I wouldn’t have reflected on myself at all, nor would I have recognized my satanic disposition of being averse to the truth, and if I’d carried on like this, I’d just have ended up being spurned and eliminated by God.

As I reflected, I read more of God’s words: “With antichrists, when it comes to the matter of being pruned, they are unable to accept it. And there are reasons they are unable to accept it, the main one being that when they are pruned, they feel they have lost face, that they have lost their reputation, status and dignity, that they have been left unable to raise their heads in front of everyone. These things have an effect in their hearts, so they find it hard to accept being pruned, and they feel that whoever prunes them has it out for them and is their enemy. This is the mentality of antichrists when they are pruned. Of this, you can be sure” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Eight)). “Antichrists like reputation and status very much. Reputation and status are their lifeblood; they feel life is meaningless without reputation and status, and they lack energy to do anything without reputation and status. To antichrists, both reputation and status are intimately tied to their personal interests; they are their Achilles’ heel. That is why everything antichrists do revolves around status and reputation. If it were not for these things, they may not do any work at all. No matter whether antichrists have status or not, the goal they are fighting for, the direction in which they are striving is toward these two things—reputation and status. … When they pay a price, look at why they pay a price. When they ardently debate an issue, look at why they debate it. When they discuss or condemn a person, look at what intent and goal they have. When they are upset or angry about something, look at what disposition they reveal. People cannot see inside people’s hearts, but God can. When God looks inside people’s hearts, what does He use to gauge the essence of what people say and do? He uses the truth to gauge it. In the eyes of man, protecting one’s reputation and status is proper. So why is it labeled in God’s eyes as the revelation and expression of antichrists, and as the essence of antichrists? This is based in the impetus and motivation for everything antichrists do. God scrutinizes the impetus and motivation for what they do, and in the end, determines that everything they do is for their own reputation and status, rather than for the sake of doing their duty, much less for the sake of practicing the truth and submitting to God” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Two)). From God’s words, I understood the reason antichrists can’t accept being pruned. Besides their essence of hating and being averse to the truth, there is another main reason for this, that they regard their reputation and status as more important than anything else in their hearts. Antichrists feel that whoever points out their problems or prunes them is trying to make life difficult for them, make them lose face, and harm their pride and status. To preserve their reputation and status, antichrists are incessantly resistant and oppositional, and even treat those who prune them as enemies. In reflecting, I saw that I too had this viewpoint. In the beginning, when I knew that brothers and sisters reported my problems to the leader, I felt that they were intentionally trying to expose my problems to the leader, making me lose face and putting me in an awkward position, and I thought that they should have told me about the issues they’d noticed in me first or pointed them out to me privately, and if I didn’t accept it, then it would be appropriate for them to report these issues to the leader. In reality, if I had truly been a person who accepted suggestions and the truth, I wouldn’t have cared about the context or the way they had brought up issues, and instead, I would have cared about what issues had been raised and how I should change and improve. The reason I had those thoughts was because I wanted to protect my reputation and status and maintain a good impression in the leader’s eyes. When Jayden gave me suggestions and exposed me in front of the brothers and sisters, I felt even more unable to accept. I thought that he was doing this to try and embarrass and humiliate me in front of everyone, and that this would seriously damage the good image people held of me. Driven by the desire for reputation and status, I indirectly countered his suggestions to redeem my reputation, and I even had malicious thoughts, wanting to use my power and position to suppress him and to prevent him from participating in the watering work. I realized that I was indeed overly concerned with reputation and status, that the basis behind all of my words and actions was to protect my pride and status, and that I even wanted to suppress people. I saw that pursuing reputation and status was truly not the right path and that it would only lead me to resist God.

Later on, I reflected on the disposition I revealed through my malicious thoughts, and I read a passage of God’s words that moved me deeply. Almighty God says: “Attack and retaliation is one type of action and revelation which comes from a malicious satanic nature. It is also a kind of corrupt disposition. People think like this: ‘If you are unkind to me, I’ll do wrong to you! If you don’t treat me with dignity, why would I treat you with dignity?’ What sort of thinking is this? Is it not a retaliatory way of thinking? In the views of an ordinary person, is this not a valid perspective? Does it not hold water? ‘I will not attack unless I am attacked; if I am attacked, I will certainly counterattack,’ and ‘Here’s a taste of your own medicine’—the nonbelievers often say such things; among them, these are all rationales that hold water and completely conform to human notions. Yet how should those who believe in God and pursue the truth view these words? Are these ideas correct? (No.) Why are they not correct? How should they be discerned? Where do these things originate? (From Satan.) They originate from Satan, of this there is no doubt. Which of Satan’s dispositions do they come from? They come from the malicious nature of Satan; they contain venom, and they contain the true face of Satan in all its maliciousness and ugliness. They contain this kind of nature essence. What is the character of the perspectives, thoughts, revelations, speech, and even actions that contain that kind of nature essence? Without any doubt, it is man’s corrupt disposition—it is the disposition of Satan. Are these satanic things in line with God’s words? Are they in line with the truth? Do they have a basis in God’s words? (No.) Are they the actions that followers of God should do, and the thoughts and points of view that they should possess? Are these thoughts and courses of action in line with the truth? (No.)” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only Resolving One’s Corrupt Disposition Can Bring About True Transformation). From God’s words, I realized that my thoughts of attack and revenge were driven by satanic poisons like “I will not attack unless I am attacked; if I am attacked, I will certainly counterattack,” and “Here’s a taste of your own medicine.” I thought that Jayden exposing my problems in front of the brothers and sisters wasn’t allowing me to save face and that he was being unkind to me, meaning I could do wrong to him. I even felt that if I didn’t show him who was boss, he’d think he could push me around, so I thought that in the future, I wouldn’t let him participate in the watering work. Then we’d see how he’d prune me. Reflecting on these thoughts and intentions at this point, I saw that I was indeed malicious and frightening. Jayden reporting my problems to the leader showed that he had a sense of responsibility toward the work and was protecting the church’s work. Also, when I sent a message in the group asking everyone for suggestions, Jayden actively shared his thoughts and opinions, showing he had a sense of burden, but I felt he was purposely making life difficult for me and I even tried to argue back and justify myself. His exposure of my issues was factual and completely appropriate, and to bring these things up directly was helpful for me in my duties, and not intended to embarrass me at all. Moreover, mutual suggestions and pruning among brothers and sisters aren’t matters of kindness or unkindness, and in my understanding of this I had the same views as disbelievers. In the past, I’d thought I had good humanity, and that I wouldn’t do anything like suppressing or tormenting others like an antichrist, but through the revelation of facts, I saw my nature was really malicious. I hadn’t done any such things before because the right situation hadn’t come about, but in certain contexts, I was capable of revealing these malicious thoughts naturally. This is a revelation of my nature. At this moment, I finally realized that being pruned is truly great, as otherwise, I’d have never recognized the fallacious views and the satanic dispositions within me, nor would I have had a way to make amends or change. I was so grateful to God and I came before God to pray, “God, I see that not only am I averse to the truth, but that my nature is also malicious. To protect my reputation and status, I even wanted to attack and retaliate against the brothers and sisters who gave me suggestions. I see that I lack humanity and am unworthy of being called a believer. God, I wish to repent and change. Please guide me to find a path of practice and entry, so I can learn to accept the suggestions of my brothers and sisters.”

During my devotionals, I sought out God’s words to read regarding my problems and found a path of practice. God says: “If someone gives you a suggestion when you do not understand the truth, and tells you how to act in accordance with the truth, you should first accept it and allow everyone to fellowship on it, and see if this path is correct or not, and whether it is in accordance with the truth principles or not. If you confirm that it is in accordance with the truth, then practice in that way; if you determine that it does not accord with the truth, then do not practice in that way. It is as simple as that. When you seek the truth, you should seek from many people. If anyone has something to say, you should listen to them, and treat all of their words seriously. Do not ignore or snub them, because this relates to matters within the scope of your duty and you must treat this seriously. This is the right attitude and the right state. When you are in the right state, and you do not reveal a disposition that is averse to the truth and hates the truth, then practicing in this way will supplant your corrupt disposition. This is practicing the truth. If you practice the truth in this way, what fruits will it bear? (We will be guided by the Holy Spirit.) Receiving the guidance of the Holy Spirit is one aspect. Sometimes the matter will be very simple and can be achieved using your own mind; after others finish giving you their suggestions and you understand, you will be able to rectify things and act in accordance with the principles. People may think that this is a small matter, but to God it is a great matter. Why do I say this? Because, when you practice in this way, to God you are a person who can practice the truth, a person who loves the truth, and a person who is not averse to the truth—when God sees into your heart, He also sees your disposition, and this is a great matter. In other words, when you do your duty and act in the presence of God, what you live out and pour forth are all truth realities that people should possess. The attitudes, thoughts, and states that you possess in everything you do are the most important things for God, and they are what God scrutinizes” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only by Often Living Before God Can One Have a Normal Relationship With Him). God’s words showed me a path of practice, which is to take others’ suggestions seriously, and no matter who makes them, regardless of whether I can understand them in the moment, or whether they align with my will, I must not neglect them, much less brush aside or belittle them. I need to first accept these suggestions and seek fellowship with everyone, and accept and practice what aligns with truth principles, and not adopt what doesn’t. The most important thing during this process is to not live by a corrupt disposition of being averse to the truth, intransigent, and arrogant, but to treat others’ suggestions with a seeking attitude instead. Later, I discussed some of the problems and suggestions brought up by the brothers and sisters with my partners to solve them one by one. After practicing this way, the results of the watering work were much better than before, and I found that the bias I’d had against Jayden had gone away. I was deeply grateful to God.

Later on, I asked myself, “What kind of attitude should I have toward brothers and sisters who point out my problems?” In my seeking, I read God’s words: “You must get close to people who can speak truthfully to you; having people like this beside you is greatly to your advantage. In particular, having such good people around you as those who, when they discover a problem with you, have the courage to reproach you and expose you, can prevent you from going astray. They don’t care what your status is, and the moment they discover that you have done something against the truth principles, then they will reproach and expose you if necessary. Only such people are upright people, people with a sense of justice, and no matter how they expose and reproach you, it is all of help to you, and it is all about supervising you and pushing you forward. You must draw close to such people; having such people beside you, helping you, you become relatively much safer—this is what it is to have God’s protection. Having people who understand the truth and uphold principles by your side every day supervising you is so beneficial to you doing your duty and work well. You must absolutely not have those sly, deceitful people who toady up to you and flatter you as your assistants; having people like this stuck to you is like having stinking flies on you, you’ll be exposed to so many bacteria and viruses! Such people are liable to disturb you and affect your work, they can cause you to fall into temptation and go astray, and they can bring disaster and calamity to you. You must keep away from them, the farther the better, and if you can discern that they have the essence of disbelievers and get them cleared out of the church, then even better. … What should you do if you wish to give the path of an antichrist a wide berth? You should take the initiative to draw close to people who love the truth, people who are upright, get close to people who can point out your issues, who can speak truthfully and reproach you when they discover your problems, and especially people who can prune you when they discover your problems—these are the people who are most beneficial to you, and you should cherish them. If you exclude and get rid of such good people, then you will lose God’s protection, and disaster will gradually come to you. By getting close to good people and people who understand the truth, you will have peace and joy, and you will be able to keep disaster at bay; by getting close to vile people, shameless people, and people who flatter you, you will be in danger. Not only will you be easily duped and tricked, but disaster may come upon you at any time. You must know what kind of person can benefit you the most—it is those who can warn you when you do something wrong, or when you exalt and testify about yourself and mislead others, that can benefit you the most. Getting close to such people is the correct path to take” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Four: They Exalt and Testify About Themselves). From God’s words, I understood that to do my duties well, I need to actively approach those who dare to speak the truth and who have a sense of justice, as they don’t consider status, power, or interpersonal feelings. They say whatever they see and expose or prune people when necessary. Having such people around me not only allows them to supervise and remind me in my duties, but also restrains my corrupt disposition. I had an arrogant disposition and always did things my way. I always thought I was right and didn’t focus on seeking principles. With such brothers and sisters around me, they’d be able to correct and expose me when I acted against principles, motivating me to reflect on myself and seek the truth. This would also help me to avoid making mistakes and walking the wrong path, and to see my nature more clearly. This would help me to do my duties well. Just like Jayden, who had been able to safeguard the church’s work, and directly speak out about and point out any problems he saw. Although the things he said embarrassed me sometimes, they were helpful for me in my duties. I had to interact more with such people and let them supervise and remind me more. Now that I think about it again, I realize this situation God arranged was really great. By accepting suggestions and pruning from my brothers and sisters, I not only managed to correct some deviations in my duties, but also gained some understanding of my corrupt disposition. I am sincerely grateful to God!