By Zhao Liang, China

One day in September 2009, two sisters and I went to preach the gospel to a religious leader. The leader, however, rejected it and summoned over ten members of his church, who beat us and took us to the local police station. I was quite frightened at the time and worried that the police would torment us. I knew that the CCP hated and resisted God above all else and could kill believers they caught with impunity. Many brothers and sisters had been tortured after arrest, and some had even been beaten to death or crippled. I was concerned that because of my small stature, I wouldn’t be able to withstand the policemen’s torture, so I pretended I was mute. When they asked me where I was from, who my church leader was and who had sent me there to preach the gospel, I didn’t say a word. They then made me hold a squat, but after squatting for a while my legs couldn’t take it anymore and I fell to the ground. Two policemen kicked and stomped on me randomly and ordered me to get up and resume squatting. After squatting for a little while longer, my legs became sore and painful and my whole body broke out in sweat. One policeman mockingly said, “How’s that feel? Pretty good eh? If you don’t start talking, we’ll make you keep squatting.” The other policeman crassly exclaimed, “You’re a stubborn one, aren’t you? I guess we’ll have to do this the hard way. I know I can pry open that mouth of yours!” After saying that, he wedged beer bottles behind my knees and said, “If these bottles fall, you’re in for a beating.” After a while, I just couldn’t hold the squat and the beer bottles fell clanging to the floor. They kicked me to the floor and began viciously kicking and stomping on me. My legs, back, shoulders and waist were in unbearable pain, and I curled up in a ball, wracked with agony in my heart. Given that China’s constitution explicitly guarantees religious freedom, we are within our legal rights to believe in God and preach the gospel, but the CCP still continually persecutes and torments us. They are truly evil! Just then, I recalled how the Lord Jesus’ disciples had been persecuted: Stephen was stoned to death alive for upholding the Lord’s way, and Peter was imprisoned for preaching the gospel and testifying to God and was ultimately crucified upside down. I thought of how God said: “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:10). These stories were very heartening to me—saints of every age had experienced enormous persecution for preaching the Lord’s gospel and had even been martyred for God. They had borne great and resounding testimony, but I had become weak and was in agony after suffering just a little persecution and torment. What I had gone through was nowhere near what the saints of previous ages had experienced. There was value and meaning to my being persecuted and tormented for preaching God’s kingdom gospel. After realizing this, I no longer felt pained and gained renewed faith. I quietly prayed to God, asking Him to give me the will to bear suffering, not give in to Satan and stand firm in my witness to glorify God.

When the police saw that I was still unwilling to speak, they forbade me from sleeping. The two policemen took turns monitoring me and as soon as they saw me close my eyes, they would kick me. At around one in the morning, two other officers who had just started their shift took me to the main hall of the police station and made me sit on the ground. One of the officers viciously yelled, “I hear you’re being really stubborn and won’t tell us anything about your belief in God. I guess I’ll have to teach you a little lesson to get you to speak!” With that, he viciously kicked me to the ground and pressed down hard on my head with his foot. It was very painful when his foot dug into my head and I felt like he was going to grind my head to smithereens. The other officer pressed down on my chest with his foot and I immediately felt short of breath and was in unbearable pain. After that, he stomped down hard on my thighs and calves. I was in utter agony within and thought, “Even though I’m not a person of great importance or high status in this world, I’ve never felt the humiliation of being stepped on before.” I continually prayed to God, asking Him to give me strength so that I could withstand this suffering and stand firm in my witness. After praying, I recalled how the Lord Jesus had been crucified: He wore a crown of thorns, was humiliated and taunted by Roman soldiers, whipped until His body was just a lattice of wounds and was ultimately savagely nailed to the cross. I thought of God’s words which say: “On the road to Jerusalem, Jesus was in agony, as if a knife were being twisted in His heart, yet He had not the slightest intention of going back on His word; always there was a powerful force compelling Him onward to where He would be crucified. Ultimately, He was nailed to the cross and became the likeness of sinful flesh, completing the work of the redemption of mankind. He broke free of the shackles of death and Hades. Before Him, mortality, hell, and Hades lost their power, and were vanquished by Him. He lived for thirty-three years, throughout which He always did His utmost to satisfy God’s intentions according to God’s work at the time, never considering His own personal gain or loss, and always thinking of the intentions of God the Father” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. How to Serve in Harmony With God’s Intentions). I thought about how the Lord Jesus is the Lord of creation and the King of the universe, but despite having such grand and honorable status, He was willing to undergo such suffering and humiliation to redeem mankind. So, what was a little suffering and humiliation to a filthy and corrupt human like me with no more value than a mere ant? It was a blessing to have the opportunity to bear this suffering and bear witness for God, so I should be happy. Having realized this, I felt renewed motivation and had the will to bear suffering. After that, they switched to another form of torture. A policeman lit a cigarette and stuck it in my nose and then balanced a drinking glass on my head, saying, “If the cigarette or the glass falls to the floor, you’re in for it.” When the cigarette had almost burned down to my nose, I exhaled through my nostrils to expel the cigarette. As soon as the officer saw the cigarette fall to the ground, he kicked and stomped me, and then grabbed four or five handfuls of unhusked rice, placed them on my neck, and lifted my collar to let the unhusked rice fall inside. I immediately felt a prickly itching throughout my body that was difficult to bear. At around five in the morning, two officials arrived. When they were informed that I hadn’t divulged any information, one of them took a belt out from their bag and began viciously whipping me on the back of my hands, shins and knees with the buckle-end of the belt. The whipping left me in searing pain. After I still wouldn’t talk after being whipped more than twenty times, they gave up and left.

In the afternoon of the second day, I was sent to the county detention house. A detention house officer told the inmates, “This one’s a believer that’s been caught proselytizing and won’t tell us anything. Take good, good care of him!” The inmates surrounded me and eyed me menacingly. They were all stripped to the waist and some even had tattoos, which made me feel a little intimidated. I’d already been tortured by the officers at the police station and my body was covered with injuries. Now I was up against a whole gang of evil and vicious-looking inmates—if they continued to torture me, would my body be able to withstand the abuse? If I couldn’t take the torment and betrayed God like Judas, then was cursed and punished, wouldn’t my belief in God be a total failure? It would be better to crack my head on the wall and end my life than betray God. Just then, I recalled a passage of God’s words: “The suffering of some people reaches an extreme, and their thoughts turn to death. This is not true love for God; such people are cowards, they have no perseverance, they are weak and powerless! God is eager for man to love Him, but the more man loves Him, the greater man’s suffering, and the more man loves Him, the greater man’s trials. … Thus, during these last days you must bear testimony to God. No matter how great your suffering, you should walk until the very end, and even at your last breath, still you must be faithful to God and at the mercy of God; only this is truly loving God, and only this is the strong and resounding testimony” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Only by Experiencing Painful Trials Can You Know the Loveliness of God). God’s words helped me realize that those who wish to die when faced with some great suffering and hardship are cowards, the laughing stock of Satan and cannot satisfy God’s intention. Before I’d been arrested, I was more vocal than anyone about loving God, satisfying God and bearing witness for Him. But when I was tortured and began to suffer, I became negative and weak and wanted to use death to escape from it all—where was my stature? Realizing this, I felt incredibly embarrassed and guilty. I quietly prayed to God, “Oh God, no matter how they torment me, I will always rely on You and stand firm in my witness.”

Under orders from the police, the head inmate demanded to know my name and address. He viciously snarled, “You’re a believer and a political prisoner, so your crimes are even more serious than a murderer’s. If you don’t talk, just wait and see what I’ll do to you!” But I still didn’t say a word. Seeing that I had no intention of speaking, he got up and twisted my arms while two other inmates pressed down on my ankles. Then, another four or five inmates took turns punching me in the calves and thighs. Each punch was unbearably painful and I felt that I wouldn’t be able to take it much longer. I thought to myself, “Will I be tormented to death by these inmates?” I continually called out to God for protection and to give me the strength to withstand the ravaging of these demons. After praying, I thought of how the Lord Jesus said: “And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear Him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell” (Matthew 10:28). Truly, these demons were indeed vicious, but they could only ravage and torment my body, they couldn’t kill my soul. What’s more, the death of the body is not a true death. Being persecuted and killed by the CCP for bearing witness to God meant I was being persecuted because of righteousness, and God commended such acts. I recalled a hymn: “With God’s exhortations in my heart, I will never bend the knee to Satan. Though our heads may roll and our blood may spill, the backbones of God’s people cannot be bent. I will bear resounding testimony for God, and humiliate devils and Satan. Pain and hardships are predestined by God, and I will be loyal and submit to Him unto death. Never again will I cause God to weep or worry. I will offer up my love and loyalty to God and complete my mission to glorify Him” (Follow the Lamb and Sing New Songs, I Wish to See the Day of God’s Glory). As I pondered the lyrics of the hymn, the will to withstand all suffering and stand firm in my witness for God grew inside of me. After their beating, my legs were covered in black and green bruises and badly swollen. The slightest touch intensified the pain. Due to the serious injuries the muscles in my legs had sustained, I was unable to squat, so I had to sit on the edge of the squat toilet when I went to the bathroom. Their brutal beatings became a regular occurrence. One of the inmates who had trained as a boxer used me as a punching bag to practice his punches and palm strikes and would often chop at my neck with his hands. Each time he wound up and chopped me on the neck, I became lightheaded. There was also a particularly vicious-looking inmate who pinned me down on the bed, grabbed my neck fiercely with his two hands and nearly strangled me to death when he saw I wouldn’t give up any information about my belief in God no matter how I was tortured. On several occasions, the head inmate and his lackeys would wrap match head fuel in cotton balls and then wedge the balls between my fingers and toes and light them on fire. It burned my fingers and toes and left them in searing pain. The head inmate would then intentionally step on my burnt toes until blood oozed from the wounds. Each time the inmates tormented and ravaged me, I would call out and pray to God, asking Him for strength. Only through God’s guidance was I able to withstand the repeated torment of the demons.

One day in late November, I underwent a fourth retrial by the prosecutor’s office, but I still refused to speak. An officer told the head inmate, “He won’t tell us anything and the prosecutor’s office is getting fed up. You’ve got to get something out of him, no matter what it takes.” After that, the head inmate ordered four or five other inmates to strip me naked, then he lit a plastic bowl on fire and let the hot melted plastic drip on my skin. Each drip made me writhe in pain—it was so excruciating that I couldn’t bear it. I violently struggled against them, but they held me down, so I couldn’t move. I called out to God repeatedly in my heart, saying, “Oh God, I can’t take it anymore. Please protect me. Give me strength, and the will to bear this suffering, so that I don’t give in to Satan and can stand firm in my testimony for You until death.” Once again, I thought of how the Lord Jesus had been nailed alive to the cross by Roman soldiers, of how His blood slowly dripped dry. Despite His greatness and honorableness, God who is on high became incarnate and endured unbearable suffering on earth to save mankind. God was innocent and did not deserve such suffering, but He quietly endured it all to save man. Given that I was just a corrupt human, enduring this little bit of suffering was no big deal at all. In China, where God is seen as the enemy, it’s hard to avoid suffering from persecution if one wants to follow God and attain the truth and life. But it is worthwhile and meaningful to suffer, because it is done in order to gain truth and be saved. This savage torment allowed me to clearly see the truth-hating, God-loathing, wicked essence of the CCP. They resist God, cruelly afflict people and are nothing more than evil spirits and demons. Realizing all this, I came to hate the great red dragon even more—the more they persecuted me, the more I would rely on God to stand firm in my testimony and humiliate them! I fought through the pain, and somehow made it through this ordeal. That night, while the inmates were sleeping, I took stock of my injuries: My thighs and calves were heavily bruised. My chest was burnt, and the skin on it was bloody and mangled. My whole body was covered in burn wounds. I thought to myself, “They’ve already reduced me to this state. Will I be able to take it if they torture me like this again tomorrow?” I shuddered to think of what excruciating pain awaited me and felt like my head would burst. I felt like the situation had already exceeded the limit of what my body could take and I was on the verge of a breakdown. I hurriedly prayed to God, “Oh God, my heart is full of fear and I don’t think I can take much more of this. Please give me the strength to stand firm.” After praying, I recalled God’s words which say: “Faith is like a single log bridge: Those who cling abjectly to life will have difficulty in crossing it, but those who are ready to sacrifice themselves can pass over, sure of foot and worry-free. If man harbors timid and fearful thoughts, it is because Satan has fooled them, afraid that we will cross the bridge of faith to enter into God” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Utterances of Christ in the Beginning, Chapter 6). God’s words showed me a path forward—only by relying on faith and putting my life on the line could I get through this sure of foot and without worry. Wasn’t I just falling for Satan’s plot by living in cowardice and fear? I prayed to God, no longer willing to live in fear and be made a fool of by Satan. I was ready to place myself completely in His hands, and would stand firm in my witness and humiliate Satan even if it meant I was beaten to death. I felt a sense of relief, and had the faith to face whatever came my way next. Just then, I recalled a hymn called “Rising Up Amidst Darkness and Oppression”: “Brutal arrests and persecution reveal the face of Satan. Through these hardships and trials, God’s words feel ever more precious. God has appeared in the flesh—how could I not follow Him? I despise Satan, and follow God with an iron will. Wherever the king of devils is in power, arduous is the path of believing in God. Satan snaps at my heels; there is no safe place to reside. Believing in and worshiping God is absolutely the right thing to do. Having chosen to love God, I will be loyal till the end. The tricks of the king of devils are savage, vicious, and truly contemptible. Having gained a clear view of the devils’ visage, I love Christ even more. I will never give in to Satan or drag out an ignoble existence. I will suffer all torment, hardship, and pain, and endure through the darkest of nights. To bring God comfort, I will bear victorious witness and shame Satan” (Follow the Lamb and Sing New Songs). This hymn spoke to me deeply, and the more I sang it, the more encouraged I felt. Only after being savagely persecuted by the CCP did I clearly see their God-resisting, cruel, demonic essence. As God’s believers, we walk the right path of life, preaching the gospel, bearing witness for God and allowing others to receive God’s salvation. This is a just act, yet the CCP frantically arrests and persecutes believers, torturing those they catch until they are on the brink of death in order to make them betray God, and to accomplish the CCP’s goal of wielding power and having control over people forever. The CCP is nothing more than a gang of demons who hate God and the truth! Once I saw the CCP for how repulsive and evil it truly is, I hated it with all my heart, abandoned it and resolved to never give in to it!

The very next day, when the head inmate saw how mangled the flesh on my chest had become from all the burns, he became a bit worried and said to the other inmates, “We can’t torture him anymore. If we kill him, the blame will be put on us and our sentences will be extended.” When I heard this, I felt that God had opened up a way out for me and I quietly gave thanks to Him. Ultimately, the police couldn’t find any evidence to indict me, but insisted on charging me with “disturbing social order,” for which I was sentenced to 75 days in jail.

I endured terrible suffering and persecution at the hands of the CCP, but God’s words enlightened and guided me every step of the way, filling me with faith and strength and ensuring that I could stand firm throughout these tribulations. Without God’s protection and the guidance of His words, I could have been tortured to death by them at any time. At the same time, I came to see how God governs and reigns sovereign over all things. No matter how savage and uninhibited Satan is, it is just God’s defeated opponent. Just as Almighty God’s words say: “Regardless of how ‘powerful’ Satan is, regardless of how audacious and ambitious it is, regardless of how great is its ability to inflict damage, regardless of how wide-ranging are the techniques with which it corrupts and lures man, regardless of how clever are the tricks and schemes with which it intimidates man, regardless of how changeable is the form in which it exists, it has never been able to create a single living thing, has never been able to set down laws or rules for the existence of all things, and has never been able to rule and control any object, whether animate or inanimate. Within the cosmos and the firmament, there is not a single person or object that was born from it, or exists because of it; there is not a single person or object that is ruled by it, or controlled by it. On the contrary, it not only has to live under the dominion of God, but, moreover, must submit to all of God’s orders and commands. Without God’s permission, it is difficult for Satan to touch even a drop of water or grain of sand upon the land; without God’s permission, Satan is not even free to move the ants about upon the land, let alone mankind, who was created by God. In the eyes of God, Satan is inferior to the lilies on the mountain, to the birds flying in the air, to the fish in the sea, and to the maggots on the earth. Its role among all things is to serve all things, to serve mankind, and to serve God’s work and His plan of management. Regardless of how malicious its nature, and how evil its essence, the only thing it can do is to dutifully abide by its function: being of service to God, and providing a counterpoint to God. Such is the substance and position of Satan. Its essence is unconnected to life, unconnected to power, unconnected to authority; it is merely a plaything in God’s hands, just a machine in service to God!” (The Word, Vol. 2. On Knowing God. God Himself, the Unique I).